


Bruises

by Dragonsbone



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: Actors, Angst, Best Friends, Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2019-07-20 15:53:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 37,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16140521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dragonsbone/pseuds/Dragonsbone
Summary: "Kit and Emilia, two good friends. Some people could say that they are best friends. But, what is happening when feelings are in the middle? Are they still "best friends?"





	1. Chapter 1

Tomorrow is the _"big day"_. This is what they told me to call it. This is what a wedding day should be named. _Besides, everything for my bestie, right?_

  I just arrived here, can't say that I'd like to stay any longer. From the airplane until the exit gates, from the car ride until the hotel arrival. The only think that I can think is him. _What is he doing right now? Is he okay? Should I call him? Nah... Such a stupid thought of mine._

  It was like centuries passed until the elevator stopped at my floor. The doors opened and I immediately start walking to my room. _631\. This is it so. I'm really doing this._  
  The room is pretty big for a tiny person as I am, but that's not a problem, obviously. I told the guy who was holding my luggage to let it in the living room, and not to care more, I headed to the kitchen for a bottle of water that I so much needed the last two hours. The fridge is full of water hopefully, and more pleasantly to me, full of alcohol as well. _Great_.

"Miss Clarke? Your luggage is next to the sofa. If you need anything, the reception's number is on the menu of the room service. Have a good day." And then he left the room without waiting for her answer, closing the door politely.

 

                                   **•+++•**

 

  I heard my phone's familiar sound next to my head as the blanket and many pillows were on and around me, denying to allow me to escape from their warm embrace. I then opened my eyes lazily and suddenly widened them realizing that my device's battery was almost dead. I stood up so fast to put my phone on the charger that I almost fell on the floor. After putting it on the charger, I decided to check my notifications that were bothering me while sleeping. Trying to sleep actually. _How could I?_  
And, as always, it was not a good idea for something to have. My Instagram account was full of the _"big news"_ , positive ones or negative, people keep tagging me to this. Pictures, videos, articles..ugh. I was gonna push the **"turn off"** button of my phone when a notification popped into the screen.

 

_**《6 missed calls, Kitten》** _

 

I was just standing in front of the screen for like five minutes looking at it. My fingers were frozen. My whole body froze. I then decided to turn the screen off, going for a shower with the thought of being a little better after that.  
I stepped in the bathroom and let the warm water to run into the bathtub. As the steam started to fill the room, mixed with the smell of the lavender soap, and as the bathtub was almost ready for me, I started to undressing myself when I heard my phone from the other room ringing. _No. I'm not willing to answer right now. I need my time._

 

                                    **•+++•**

 

"I really needed this.", saying to myself laying in the bathtub with eyes shut, travelling in my thoughts.  
My phone is ringing again. It's the fourth time, I thought then. Or at least the fourth time I heard it ringing. I don't want to get out of this little heaven, as I love to call it, but I know that I have to. With small and almost lazy steps, I got out of the water, frowning to my reflection on the mirror. I grabbed the towel from the counter and wrapped it on me, feeling the cold already on my pale skin. It was then that I heard noises from outside of my bathroom. The noises became more and more louder, causing me to be scared. I took the scissors from the counter and slowly opened the door in front of me.

  Stepping out, nothing was on my view. Maybe it was from the next hotel room, not all the hotels have thick walls, haven't they? Letting a breath that I didn't realize that I had inside my lungs, I headed to my living room to find an outfit to wear.  
  Suddenly, my knees felt weak. The scissors fell on the floor as my hands run to fix my towel awkwardly. He was there. His back in front me. What the--

"Emilia! What the fock?".


	2. ~Can't you see?~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I suggest you to listen to "Alibi (3a.m.) by Empara Mi" for this part. Enjoy!

"Emilia! What the fock? I called you for fifteen times! Where the hell have you been?!", he said approaching me with those warm brown eyes of his, now a spark of anger in them.

 _*fifteen times?!*_ I thought, without doing a single step from where I was standing before.

"Are you okay?", he said now calmer, caressing the side of my face, and looking at it as he's trying to find scars.

"I'm fine, Kit. Just calm down please.", I said, putting my hand over his and caressing it with my thumb.

"You scared me, Em. Do you know that?", he said as he approached even more, my hands now touching the wall behind me and my front almost glued to his chest.

"Kit...", trying to make him look at me.

"Don't. Please." He then cupped my neck with one hand, with the other touching the wall in front of him, leaning against it for support.

"I don't think--", he stopped me putting his thumb on my lips. Suddenly, he started caressing my lower lip with his thumb looking at it, causing me to shut my eyes and shallow uneasy.

"Can't you see, Em? Isn't this enough for you?", his face now closer, allowing me to feel his warm breath on my full lips.

"Kit.. Stop, please. You're getting married tomorrow.", I said trying to keep my tears back, my eyes now open looking at his deeply. But he does not give up so easily. Kitten never do that.

 

"You know what I want. As you know exactly what you want too." His both hands cupping my face, forcing me to look at him as his eyes are filling slowly with tears.

"It doesn't matter what I want. It is your chance to make the family you always wanted. Kit--"

"You are the family I always wanted to have, Em! I can not imagine my life without you, it is just impossible."

"Kitten...", wiping a single tear from his beloved cheek, causing him to close his eyes at the touch, letting more drops to fall. "Please, do not cry, Kit. I... I am here.", I said trying to lift his head to make him to look at my direction.

"Kit. Kitten, pleas--" Suddenly his lips crashed into mine with a fast move. I shut my eyes close, lost in the moment as he is kissing me lovingly. The kiss then became deeper as I kiss him back and he hit his body on mine, sending us straight to the wall.

"You didn't answer me.", he started between our kisses. "Why you did not reply to my calls?" He left my mouth making a line stopping at my jaw and then my neck, kissing and biting as it was the first time.

"I- I couldn't.", I replied, eyes closed as my shaking hands were trying to keep the towel in place.

"Oh. And why is that?" Coming again for my lips.

"I was-- in the bathroom-."

"I see.." now trying to take my towel off.

"Kit-- We can't-" I said. "Not again-."

"Why not, love? You belong to me.", he said while lifting one of my legs on his waist, and then the other. I giggled and he smiled between his kisses.

_Oh how I've missed you, Kitten._

"As you belong to me.", I said burying my fingers into his hair, pulling gently the roots. Being on him, we went to the bedroom, a nice grey place with not many colourful items in it, the bed, a king sized cloud, with a plenty of pillows around. The night sky already out there. Kit sat me down removing my towel completely and throwing it away. He then stood on his knees on the bed to remove his shirt while I was watching him from below. Throwing his clothe away as well, he leaned forward looking at me hungrily, his eyes dark as I bite my lower lip.

"You're driving me crazy. This little mouth of yours.." he leaned closer taking my lower lip between his teeth and biting gently. A moan escaped then from me without my permission, causing him to smirk and kiss me harder than before. Our hands are exploring each other's body, Kit's stopped to care my breasts while mine trying to undo his trousers, feeling every inch of his desire for me.

"I need you.", he whispered while drawing a line of wet kisses down my jaw, my neck, my breasts, keep going down, and down. I couldn't speak. I couldn't think. **_I am his, as he is mine._**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this part. Your feedbacks are important so let me know if you liked it and want me to continue. Thanks for reading!


	3. ~Good morning~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thank you so much for your comments and kudos, I love you all! Enjoy!

The morning came sooner than I expected. Last night was crazy. _'You're mine. You will always be mine. Do not forget this, Em.',_ he said to me at the third time of our love making. I couldn't believe what I just did. I then felt a feeling of guilt, as pictures and sounds came to my mind from the night before. _How could I face them all ever again? How am I going to face her again?_

 

  She knew. She always knew about this. From the begging, she knew that this was happening between us. Even when she was not _"the girlfriend"_ back then, when she was a good friend, she could feel it in our every move. But then I stepped back. I thought it was the best decision to make, the distance was awful. I could never forgive myself if I did anything to hurt him, no. But, it was the worst decision I could make at that time.  
  Time passed, months, years, **"Game of Thrones"** becoming more and more successful. He was always finding time for us. Even if it was not the most wise thing. Even if it was all of this wrong. We were not able to stop. Every time was like the first, missing each other even more as we separated for our work, for our duties.  
  We always managed to meet each other on the holidays. We had such a great time, trying to stay friends as longer as we could. _But that's not us_.

 

  
  The morning light started to creep into the room, making its way from the heavy grey curtains that dressing so beautifully the glass entrance of the balcony. Familiar scent filling my lungs. Opening my eyes, I found myself trapped in his arms, my head on his bare chest and hands hugging his waist. I then felt him moving, I lifted my eyes to his.

"Good morning, Em.", he said flashing a smile that I so long had to see.  
"Morning, Kitten.", I said as I return the smile, causing him to smile even more.  
"I don't wanna go away from this room, this bed, from you.", his gaze now framed by a serious mask as his eyes travelling all over my face, stopping at my eyes.  
"You know you have to..", I said turning my eyes down, for him not to see them as they were slowly becoming more and more watery, starting to caress his chest with my small fingertips.

  
"Emilia. Look at me.", trying unsuccessfully to make me look at him. "Please...", he said lifting my chin up. My eyes met his lovely ones. He putted a lock of my hair behind my ear and exhaled heavily.  
"I know that this situation is difficult. For both of us. We will find a way again. We are always finding a way.", his fingers now caressing the side of my face, wiping my drops.

 

  
                                    **•+++•**

 

"How did you find me?", I said while opening the fridge to take two bottles of water. I approached him on the living room and sat down to the couch with my bowl of yogurt and fruits. "Kit?"

  
"Huh?", looking at his plate full of pancakes.

  
"How did you know that this is my hotel? Or even my room?" I looked at him with a frown on my eyebrows.

  
He then turned his eyes on me and chuckled with a smirk on his beautiful lips.  
"What?!", I said a little bit annoyed, hitting him playfully on the arm.

  
"Ouch!", acting as I hit him hard. "What do you mean? I booked your hotel.", he said without stopping to smile. "And your room. Also, I have a second key."

  
"Oh. Umm..", I said a bit confused, stopping to eating, relaxing my hands and looking across into the room. It was then that the spoon fell off my fingers and landing on the floor.  
"Shit." I took the spoon off the floor, cursing at my clumsiness.

  
"Wait." He then took the spoon off my fingers, putting it in my bowl. "You have-" grabbing my wrist and looking at it. "-some breakfast here. Your fingers.", he said smiling. Suddenly, his smile faded as he looked me in the eyes, he raised my hand to his mouth, and putted my fingers one by one into it to clean me up, still looking at me.

  
  "Your phone-.", I said with my eyes closed, trying to shallow unsuccessfully. "Kit."  
He turned his gaze behind his shoulder, putting my finger out with a loud pop. He then looked at me again. It was her.

"You have to go." Standing up from the couch, I headed to my suitcase to change from his shirt.


	4. ~It's time~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! The next chapter is here! Thank you all for your comments and kudos, it means a lot <3 Enjoy!

"You have to go.", I said, standing up from the couch, I headed to my suitcase to change from his shirt. He followed me and grabbed my wrist, pulling me closer.

"Please. Keep it.", he looked me in the eyes, his fingertips touching the buttons on his shirt on me.

"Okay..", I whispered. "But, please. Go now. It's time." My palm's caressing his cheek. He leaned forward, kissing me slowly. 

I stepped back, allowing his lips to be free once again. He looked at me with those big brown eyes and turned to grab his things. I went to the door, waiting for him to go.  

Once he's ready, he approached me on the entrance, holding his phone and car keys. "I'll go now.", he said.

"I know." Stepping aside to let him through.

He pulled me into a hug, putting his chin over my head. "Em?"

"Yes?"

"I want you to know that I- I love you. No matter what. Okay?"

"Okay." He then placed a hard kiss on my forehead, stepping back to look at me and opening the door as he exhaled loudly.  

He left. I was looking at the door for a couple of minutes, trapped in my thoughts. I sat down on the floor, laying my back and head on the door behind me.

_"What am I doing?"_

 

 

                                **•+++•**

 

 

I'm late. Everyone's there by now, I guess. I don't know if I want to go. But, he needs me. At least, this is what he said to me.

_'Emilia, please. I can't do this if you're not there with me. I need you.',_ he said to me while caressing my hair and neck with his fingertips, laying on the bed the night before.

  I'm angry. Why does he have to marry her if he needs me? _'You know I can not escape from this. I will ruin my life. And yours too.',_ his eyes now piercing mine. _'I can't take that risk, Em. I could never forgive myself.'_

_'I understand.'_ , I said laying my head on his chest, my eyes lost in the dark room.

 

 

                                   **•+++•**

 

 

I took a deep breath. Grabbing my bag, I opened my room's door and headed to the elevator.

  My phone is ringing again. Please don't... _*Thank God*_ , I thought.

"Hello?"

"Emilia? Hi, where are you?"

"On my way, Peter.", I said looking at the ceiling.

"Oh great. Good.", he sounds relieved. "Actually, we are a bit late too. Erika has some things to do first. Would you like to come with us?"

"Oh! Umm...yeah. Yes, why not?!", forcing a smile.

"Great. We will be there in two minutes."

"Okay, I'll be on the front door!", I said while waving goodbye to the security guy. "Oh, and Peter! My hotel's name is-"

"I know the name, don't worry."

_What the-?_

"Kit told me.", he then told me as if he heard my thoughts.

"Umm..good..see ya in two?", I said holding tighter my bag.

"Yes! Just on our way to you! Bye, Em." He hung up without waiting for my response.

_Does it gets any better?_   

 

 

                                    •+++•

 

 

  Photographers are everywhere. _That was the privacy, Kitten?_

"It's time, as it seems.", Peter said looking at me, tapping my knee. "And Em. Don't worry. I can understand you, things will be better soon." His eyes now looking at the crowd outside. I didn't say anything. I just smiled waiting for the door to open.

"Peter! A photo please! Emilia!" The flashes went crazy. The people were yelling and clapping their hands, trying to get closer.

_Oh my god. So many people._

  I managed to arrive at the yard of the church. I immediately spotted Sophie and Maisie and started to walk to them.

"Emilia! You're here!", Maisie said.

"Heyy gurl! I'm glad you came. I thought you were not!" Sophie pulled me into a hug.

"Hi guys! I'm happy to see you again! Where else should I were?!", I said faking a bright smile.

"Right..", Sophie said to me looking me in the eyes, as she was trying to find something in them.

"Look! The ceremony begins, let's take our seats." Maisie said then started to walk with Sophie by her side.

_Yup. Let's do this._

 

 

  The inside of the church is beautiful, the room big enough for two hundred people. "So it can fit the crowd outside too." I said to myself, observing the place.

"What?", Maisie looked at me.

"What-? Nothing.", I flashed an innocent smile to her. She then turn her head, allowing me to let my breath to escape. We took our seats.  

And then, he was there. In front of me, waiting for her to come. His eyes burning into mine, his grib tighter on the flowers.   Music started to play. The piano's melody echoing in the church. She is here. She's behind me. I can see it in his eyes. She tapped my shoulder and flashed a smile. I smiled back at her. I looked at her as she was approaching him. Her dress is beautiful. Her make up simple and innocent. His hand stretching to grab hers and to help her stand next to him. He looked at me one more time. One last time. And then, his back was on me.

  The ceremony has began. They were standing in front of each other, their hands embraced.

"Repeat after me, please. I, Kit,"

"I, Kit,"

"Take you, Rose,"

"Take you Em-", he stopped, looking at me. I froze.


	5. ~What are you doing?~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thanks for your comments and kudos once again, you're the best! Enjoy!

"Repeat after me, please. I, Kit,"

"I, Kit,"

"Take you, Rose,"

"Take you Em-", he stopped, looking at me. I froze.  "-Rose,"

"to be my wife."

"-to be my wife."

 

Maisie putted her hand on my knee in a fast move, her eyes widened, looking at Kit.  
"Em?" Sophie whispered, confused.  
I had nothing to say. My blood runs cold.  
"I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health."

 

"I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health." His eyes travelling to me.

 

"I will love and honor you all the days of my life."  
He hesitated. Hands relaxed a bit, as if he wanted to let hers down. He took a deep breath, returning his gaze to his soon-to-be wife.  
"I will love and honor you all the days of my life."

 

"I named you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

 

_Okay. That's enough._

 

"Exuse me." I said to Sophie, trying to pass.  
"Where the hell are you going? Everyone is looking at you. Sit down please.", she whispered.  
"I'm sorry, I have to go outside." My feet walking  faster than I expected, I approached the entrance hearing whispers from behind.

 

 

                                     **•+++•**

 

 

  "Damn you, Emilia." I said to myself. _Why am I a coward? I should be there too. I can handle it, of course I can! Besides, I promised to him that I'll be by his side. I'm going in._

 

  The moment I decided to return, the front door of the church opened wide and people started to walk out. I can feel every pair of eyes on me as they're walking around me. Sophie then walked out with Maisie, approaching and looking at me with wide eyes.

 

"What the hell, Em?! Are you okay? What happened?!"  
"I'm fine, don't worry. I just needed some fresh air, that's all."  
"I don't know what is going on with you, but Kit went crazy when you left." Maisie said looking at the crowd outside. "God, that's a lot of people out there."

 

"Wait, what?" My stomach is twisting. "What do you mean?"

  
"He was pale as hell and sweating, looking at the direction you left. Rose looked mad tho. She was trying so hard to get his attention.", Sophie mentioned, chuckling at her words.

 

"Oh. Well, I don't know what happened. I hope he's better now." _Fuck._  
"Yeah, I hope that too." Sophie's eyes on me.  
"Okay. Umm.. what now?", I said cleaning my throat with eyes looking at anywhere but Sophie.

 

  
  Clapping hands got our attention, people make space for the couple. I immediately got back, allowing others to go in front. I was never more thankful for my tiny body. I hope I'll remain hidden from photographers here. From all of them. From him, if it needed.

 

  They are walking out of the church, both smiling at the crowd. She grabbed his hand, he looked at her surprised, but he did what she was asking. People cheering, smiling at them and wishing happiness. He was trying to find my eyes. _No, Kit. Not now._

 

  They were in front of the car, Kit's opening the door for her, when the crowd started to yell at them, wanting them to kiss.  
  He finally found me. His lips parted, as if he was to say something. I shook my head saying no to him.  
"Kiss, kiss, kiss!"  
His eyes still on mine.

  
"I can't." He moved his lips so I was the only one to see these words. My breath is fading. _Please go, Kitten._

  He said something to her when she approached him for the kiss, regretting her move.  
  He helped her to get in the car and went for his seat. As soon as he was in, the car started to move, going more and more away, fast.

 

 _What are you doing, Kit?_  
                                    
 


	6. ~Just married~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter is here! Let me know your thoughts on it and if you have any suggestion it is welcome :) Enjoy!

 I'm finally at my hotel's room. I can now relax a bit. _What a day, huh?_ I took of my shoes, I changed my clothes and laid on the bed. I knew that turning on the TV was a big mistake. Every channel was playing videos and pics from this morning.

 

 

 

**_ •Exclusive photos of the happily married couple, Game of Thrones co-stars Kit Harington and Rose Leslie, on June 23th today. All the news about their lovely wedding• _ **

 

 

Kit Harington- arriving at his own wedding, brooding as always, Jon Snow!

 

 

 

_Sophie Turner and Maisie Williams, the Stark sisters attending to theirs screen-brother's/cousin's "big day" in black and red._

 

 

_John Bradley, Joe Dempsie, Conleth Hill and Peter Dinklage in elegant suits._

                                

 

 

 

 

 

_The ceremony didn't take long, as the couple couldn't wait to leave the place._

 

 

 

 

_And then we have our lovely Mother of Dragons, Emilia Clarke, who arrived at the wedding of her co-stars, and best friends, a little bit later than the others. We so much want to know what happened there. Is there something that's happening with the cast of Game of Thrones?_

 

 

_Meanwhile, we all can admire the bride's wedding dress and the tones of flowers that floating around. But we also can see the groom and this beautiful watch that he choose to wear at the most important day of his life. We guess that it could be a gift from his beloved one. Who knows? Both bride and groom were so happy this morning and we wish them happiness forever!_  
_ Just married! _

 

 

_The watch. I can remember it._  
  It was a wonderful day back then in Iceland, the weather was unexpectedly kind for a month like January.

 

 

 

_**Knock knock** _

 

 

"Clarke, are you ready? We have to go.", Kit said to me while opening the bathroom's door.

 

 

"In a bit. Let me do my make up first, Harington."

 

 

"Oh come on! We have so many things to do!", he's now approaching me in front of the mirror. "And I can say that no make up needed on this tiny face.", he said tapping my nose playfully.

 

 

"Shut up, you can't win anything with these words. Besides, we have 72 hours to do all that things that you're talking about.", I said leaning on the mirror and applying eyeshadow.

 

 

"I don't think that this is enough time." His hands hugging me from behind. He bent his head so he could reach the spot behind my ear and started a line of kisses on my neck.

 

 

"If you keep doing this I don't think that we will ever manage to leave the place." My eyes closed, and my voice almost a whisper.

 

 

 

"That's not a problem for me.", his hands on my waist pulling my jumper up and touching the bare skin there, causing me to shiver. "I know that you don't want to go out either. Let's stay here, in a warm place."

 

 

"Nah..you promised me we will go for sighting." I said as I escaped from his embrace, giving him a kiss and heading to the living room for my bag.  
"You're something, Clarke.", he chuckled and took his keys.

 

 

 

                                       **~~~**

 

 

 

 

"Aww you're kidding me! This is so beautiful! And you wanted to stay in the room?!", I said amazed by the amazing view.

 

 

"Heyy, do not judge me. Anyway, I knew that you will love it." He putted his hand in his pockets staring at the ground.  
I took advantage of it and run to make a snow ball. "Hey, Kitten!"

 

 

"Yeah?-- Ouch!" The snow ball hit him on the head, talking off his cap. "Really?!", he bent over to make one too.

 

 

"Oh don't you dare, Harington. No no no, don't-- ugh!"

 

"It was my turn.", a smirk on his pale face.

 

"We're okay now."

 

"I hate you."

 

"Oh you know that's not true." He said taking me in for a tight hug, wearing on me his cap and putting my head under his chin.

 

"You know you love me.", he whispered.

 

"Yeah, right." My anger still there.

 

"Say it. I wanna hear it from you, Clarke."

 

"No."

 

"Say it, otherwise I will cry it out loud so everyone here can hear me."

 

"Are you crazy?! There are people out here that will find out who we are and then we fucked!" I said pulling myself out of his hug a bit to look at his face.

 

"Hmm.. well, do I look like I care? Okay, 3, 2, 1-"

 

"Okay okay, fine!" I putted my hand on his mouth. "I love you, pleased enough?!"

 

"What? I can't hear you."

 

"Ugh, you're really getting on my nerves.", I murmured.

 

"What?!"

 

"I love you! Satisfied?!", my voice a bit louder than I wanted to be.

 

"Yeah. I think I'm okay now." He looked at me with a bright smile, my eyes burning with anger. "Come on, Clarke. Do not be mad at me." He then kissed the tip of my nose and I blushed. "I love you too, Em. Don't forget it. Let's go for a walk now."

 

 

 

 

                                      **~~~**

 

 

 

 

"Look! Isn't this one beautiful?!"

 

"I don't know, Em.." 

 

"You should try it! Come here!", I said pulling his hand.  
He lifted his sleeve and I putted the watch on his wrist. "It's perfect!"

 

 

"Indeed, it's a nice one.", a smile one his lips while looking at it. It was the last thing I needed.

 

 

"Okay, wait here. Do not take it off of your hand."

 

"Yes, my Queen."

 

"Staph." I smiled back at him and turned to pay for the watch.

 

 

 

 

                                     **•+++•**

 

 

 

 

  Night is already here. I can't sleep, this day was too much for me. I was tossing and turning for about one hour, and still nothing. _Should I check on him? Is he okay after what happened at the church? No. Go to sleep, Em. It's late. He also have his now wife to make sure he is alright. Right..?_

 

 

_***buzz buzz***_

 

 

_Hey.._  
_I just wanted to say, thanks for coming. It meant a lot to me._  
_Em..we will find a way, I promise. Have a good night._  
_I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry if the images are not available, if someone know how to fix this please comment below, it will be really helpful! Find my story also on Wattpad (pics are there) :)


	7. ~Sunrise~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, a new chapter is here again! I hope you like it and share your thoughts on it with me if you want, enjoy!

__

* * *

_** Kit** _

  
  
My head is spinning. The day is finally over. She is laying next to me, sleeping. But she's not her. The woman who was in my arms when the sun rose in the sky this morning. The place that she should be right now. But, my arms are empty.

  
  
**_*buzz buzz*_**

  
  
_E: Why are you doing this?_

  
  
I didn't expect from her to reply so fast. To be honest, I didn't except her response at all. I looked at my watch. My favourite watch. _02:15'am_.

  
  
_K: Why aren't you sleeping?_  
  
_E: I can't. And you?_

  
  
_*Oh Em... I missed you already*_

  
  
_K: Me neither..._  
  
_E: Right._  
_Kit... What was that in the church?_  
  
_K: Nothing that I would regret for._  
_Emilia, I need to see you._

  
  
It was like centuries passed until the three dots  started to move.

  
  
_E: Did you lost your mind? It's late. Please, do not make it more difficult than it is already. I know. You said that we will figure this out, but now it's not the right time to do this._

  
  
The three dots started to move once again.

  
  
_E: Look. I want to see you too, Kit. You cannot imagine how much. But this is impossible, and you know it. Just...go to sleep._  
  
_K: I understand. At least will I be able to see you tomorrow?_  
  
_E: I don't think so.. I'm leaving tomorrow morning._  
  
_K: Oh. Well, it's gonna be a bad day for me so._  
  
_E: Yeah. It will be ;) Goodnight, Harington._  
  
_K: Goodnight, Clarke._

 

  
  
  
  
                                  **•+++•**

 

  
  
  
  
  She's so beautiful as she's standing on the balcony's glass door, wearing nothing but my white shirt. Her arms around her body, her back to me.

  
  The sun started to rise, making the sky purple,  then orange and pink, as the moon was saying it's last goodbye. With a light wind that was blowing her hair, her scent filled my lungs. Laying on the bed, I chuckled, admiring my perfect view.

  
  She heard me and turn her attention to me, with a big bright smile that only she could show.

  
"You woke up." It was not a question, but I noded, motion to her to come over.

  
"Good morning, Clarke." I said as she snuggled in my arms and I putted the sheets over us. I then kissed her head and she turned to me, without stopping to smile.  
"Morning. It's stil early, you can sleep a bit more."

  
"Nah. I have better plans." I then turned our bodies, me being on the top.

  
She giggled. "Oh, really?" A smirk on her face. "And what are these plans exactly?"

  
"Let's just say that we have to get rid of this shirt of mine, shall we?" My fingers finding the buttons and start to undo them one by one.

  
Her smile faded slowly, she cupped my neck with one hand and buried the other one in my hair. She bit her lower lip, and I could not resist anymore. I bent over to capture it, but she surprised me by rolling our bodies over, now me being below.

  
"What are you doing?", I said between her kisses, as her hands moved from my hair to my lower abdomen.

  
"I have some plans too, Harington. This time, I have the control." She then raised to her knees and start to unbutton my shirt on her, her legs on each side of my body. After she took it off, she threw it on the floor and leaned forward, capturing my lips.

  
  She took my hand, placing it on her breast, leaning her lower body down at the same time, taking me in in one breath.

  
"Oh my God, Em." I tried to catch my breath as she started to move slowly and then faster.

  
  She rose her head so she could see my burning face, my name on her lips. But suddenly, the sound started to fade away, her face no longer there, but I still could hear my name...

 

  
_"Kit!"_

 

  
I opened my eyes to see Rose, standing in front of me.

  
"Kit, wake up." She stood there, looking at me with a bag on her thin hands.

  
"What is it? Is something wrong?", I said stretching my arms.

  
"You tell me. You're panting like an animal.", she said gathering her things. "Anyway, I just wanted to say that I'm going out with my sisters, I'll come later to take you for lunch out in our yard. Where the hell is my phone? Oh, there it is. Okay, see you later. Bye." And then she open the door and left.

 

  I have to call her. Standing up from the bed, I grabbed my phone from the tea table and dailed her number. Nothing. I looked at my watch, _11:02' a.m._ . She's probably on the plane right now.

  
  
_I hope you had a good flight, please call me when you'll arrive. I love you._

* * *

 


	8. ~Belfast~

Hello guys! This part contains mature adult situations, please read at your own choice. <3 Feel free to share your thoughts! And remember, everything is better with a lil music on the background, enjoy!

* * *

  
  


_Belfast. We met again._  
All started here. The show, my career, Kit and I.. Every time was like the first. We were trying to stay away from each other, this couldn't work. Once was the distance, so many miles between us every year. Never filming together. Then, were the others, Seth, Rose. But that was impossible even then. I still have on my mind that night, when the phrase _"best friends"_ got a different meaning for us.

 

 

**~~~**

 

 

  
_**Belfast, November 2011**_

  The filming for _season 2_ has began a few months ago, we all are so exited for it. I was in Croatia the last two months, filming, I miss my co-stars so much, especially my best friend. But now I have a little break, plus that we all have a meeting in the town. But he doesn't know that I'll be there. _My surprise will be massive!_

  The sun's coming down, I just arrived in Belfast, took my luggage and ready to go to the hotel where all of my co-stars are.

  The weather is exactly as I left it two months ago, cloudy and cold, or as I like to say, like his face nearly everyday. But the truth is that it doesn't takes me too long to steal a smile from it. _Oh Kitten._

  I got in the cab easily, it's nice that people do not know who you are sometimes. I can see small rain drops falling on the window of the car, the city lights so bright against the purple sky. I love this place. I fell in love with it from the first time I came here, one year ago, when I learned that I got the role. I couldn't believe it. It was just a dream. A dream that gave me so much so far, and will give me many more in the future, I'm sure about that.

 I'm here. _God, it's really cold out here!_ I have to get used to it again, it was nice two months with the warm sun upon my head. I wrapped my coat tighter on me and headed to the hotel's lobby with my suitcase.

  "Oh! Emilia is that you?!", a little girl with dark brown hair said to me from the back and I turned to see Maisie, a lovely kid who's playing in the show. Although our scenes are in really different places, so we never meet each other on the set. She is Jon Snow's little sister. I joked once that I'd love to play Arya, so I could spend more time with my best friend, but he laughed cause we both knew that I was far away from an eleven years old girl. We will never have a common scene in the show as it seems.

 

"Hello, Maisie! I love your new haircut!"

 

"Yeah, me too.", she said rolling her eyes and I laughed.

 

  "Emilia! Hi!", this time was a girl not much older than Maisie, with red hair and stunning blue eyes. She's also playing Jon Snow's sister, older that Arya but younger that Jon. I offered to play her role too, but he turned it down for obvious reasons.

 

"Hi, Sophie! What are you two doing here that late? Shouldn't you be on your rooms right now?", I said with a playful smirk on my face.

 

"Come on, Emilia! It's not that late yet! We still can play a bit more here!", a big smile on her small face.

 

"Okay, I guess you can.", I looked at both of them, "Umm... Do you guys know where Kit is?"

 

  Sophie and Maisie looked at each other at the same time with a smile, and then back to me.

 

"He is in his room, _631_ if I'm not mistaken." Sophie said.

 

"He's talking about you all the time, fortunately you came and now he will stop hopefully.", Maisie said rolling her eyes again, but a smile appeared on her face.

 

I chuckled. "Okay, thanks guys! See you tomorrow!" I took my luggage and headed to the lift.

 

  My heart started to beat fast as the elevator's doors opened on his floor. I'm walking in the corridor, trying to find his room.

 

_Yup. 631. That's it._  
 I knocked three times and waited for him to open the door. I bit my lower lip, having a big smile, like a little child who can't wait to see it's Christmas gift.

 

" _I'm coming_.", he said sleepy from the inside.

 

He then opened the door, rabbing his eye with one hand and leaning on the door with the other. His eyes widened as soon as he saw me, he looked at me with a big sleepy smile. I couldn't resist and letting my bag on the floor, I jumped on him and hugged him tight.

"Oh, wow! Hi, Clarke!" He hugged me back and let me down to look into my face.  
"Hello, Kitten." The stupid smile still on my face.

"What are you doing here?!"

"We have a meeting. You forgot it, didn't you?", I said putting my bag and suitcase inside of the room, to close the door.

"I thought the sun there was enough to change your mind."

"And miss the chance to see your broody face once again? Nah, I don't think so." I sat on the couch.

"Oh shut the fuck up, Clarke. I'm not brooding.", he said approaching me.

"Yeah, whatever." I rolled my eyes, causing him to chuckle.  
  
"I missed you, Em."  
  
  


 

**~~~**

 

 

"Come on, Kit! The film is starting!"  
I'm laying on the bed, on pyjamas, grey shorts and a black T-shirt with the symbol of Ghostbusters. I was never feeling uncomfortable wearing pyjamas and shorts in front of him, everything is so natural when we're together.

"Just give me a minute, Clarke! I said I'm coming."

I rolled my eyes. It's nearly midnight. How long does it takes to someone to brush his teeth?

"Did you decide what film we will watch?", he said coming out of the bathroom, blue sweatpants, and shirtless.

  I stared at him longer than I actually should and he looked at me, confused. _Kit is handsome, yeah. My best friend is beautiful and cute, actually. He is my best.._ "Emilia?" He approached me, waving his hand in front of my face.

"Huh? What?", I said shaking my head and cleaning my throat.

"Did you decide what film we will watch or nah?", he chuckled.

"Yup. _'My best friend's wedding'_."

"Oh come on, Em! Romance? Really?"

"Shut up, Harington. I'm sure you're gonna love it!", I said with a big smile, now sitting on my knees on the bed.

He said nothing, just chuckled and pushed my face backwards, causing me to fall on the pillows of the bed with my head. "Hey! Ugh."  
He turned his back to me, shaking his head.  
_I have to admit that he's working out a lot lately..._

 

**_*buzz buzz*_ **

 

The message on his phone beside me dragged me in the reality again, no longer admiring him. I grabbed it before he could and open the message, reading loudly.

 

" _Hey Kit, I was wondering if you have some time for a drink. I had so much fun the previous time. Rose._ " My face must had an expression of disgust or something and he started to laugh.

 

"What is it?", I said obviously annoyed.

"I was going to make the same question to you." He approached me. "Is Milly jealous of something?"

"Who, me? Nahh. Why should I be?", I forced a smile and then he approached me ever more, I leaned on my back with him over my body. My smile faded as he put a lock of my hair behind my ear and caress my cheek with his thumb.

"No one can replace you, Em." His gaze went from my eyes to my lips. The beating of my heart became faster and louder, as if it could came out of my body. I could feel my pulse on my fingertips. But then, he cleaned his throat, kissed my forehead and push himself up to stand.

"Do you know where my T-shirt is?"

"Oh! You mean this one?", I said with a weak smile, showing the T-shirt to him as he turned to look at me.

"Funny, Clarke. Now give it to me."

"What?! Now?!", I said with wide eyes. He then started laughing and turned his back to me once again.

"I'm just kidding, you idiot. Keep it.", he told me while looking for an other T-shirt to wear from his wardrobe. "It looks better on you anyway.", he whispered. His back still on my direction, but I could clearly see that he was smiling from the mirror in front of him. He lifted his head and looked at me through the mirror with the small smile still on his face.

"Thanks.", I blushed.  
  
  


 

**~~~**

 

 

"Are you crying?"

"Nah."

"Do not lie to me, I know you."

I said nothing. Just hugged my pillow tighter, hiding my face in it, only my eyes on the view so I can watch the film.

I felt some movement beside me and suddenly his hand was around my shoulders, pulling me closer to his body.

"Hey. Look at me.", he said trying to take the pillow from my arms. I lifted my head and looked at him with watery eyes. "It's just a movie, Em.", he's now wiping with his thumb the single drop that fell off of my eye. "They're smiling, you see?", he told me with a smile on his lips, pointing the wedding scene that was playing on the TV.

  I suddenly felt so stupid for crying like a baby and my cheeks turned to red immediately. I nodded and putted my head over his chest, hugging his waist with my hands.

"Aww, I love that song." I whispered between the pillow.

"Oh really?", he said with a small smile and stood up from the bed, pulling me with him.

"What are you doing?", I smiled back at him as he said nothing, guiding us to the empty space of the room.

He placed my arms on his shoulders and putted his hands around my waist. The space between us became smaller, the smile no longer on his beautiful face. We started to move in the rhythm of the song.  
  


 

 

_~Some day, when I'm awfully low, when the world is cold, I will feel a glow just thinking of you, and the way you look tonight~_

 

 

  
  He is so close to me. His breath so warm against my face.  
  


 

 

_~Oh but you're so lovely, with your smile so warm, and your cheeks so soft, there is nothing for me but to love you, just the way you look tonight~_

 

 

  
 It is so hard for me to resist anymore. His eyes are burning into mine, his breath's coming out with difficulty.

 The sound of the TV is no longer playing in my ears. I raised my hands to his head slowly, putting them on his neck. I leaned forward and, closing my eyes, I took his soft lips on mine.

  Everything happened so fast. Reality hit me hard as I realised what I was doing. 

"I'm so sorry! I didn't... I should not do that, I'm so sorry!", I said pulling out of his embrace, lowering my head, my eyes on the ground. I turned my back to him, ready to get out of here and lock myself in the loo for my remaining life, when he grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer, our faces now a few inches apart.

"No.", he whispered to me, caressing the side of my face, his eyes travelling all over my face as he exhaled heavily.

 Suddenly, his lips crashed into mine with a fast move and the next thing I knew was that my back clashed on the wall so hard that I was sure there'll be bruises in the morning.

  Kit then freed my lips and rested his forehead on mine while we both were trying to get some air.

"You can not imagine how long I've been waiting for this.", Kit said, holding my waist.

  I grabbed tightly at his shirt with both hands, trying to breath, my eyes closed.

  One hand of his came up to my face, pushing it to one side gently so that he could have access to my neck. At first, he started kissing it slowly but then, his teeth found my bare flesh and he started biting and sucking it as goosebumps crept and filled my entire body. I pushed his head into my neck, burying my fingers in his curled hair. He then found my lips once again, while his hands were pulling the T-shirt, that it was on me, over my head. A small smile appeared on his lips between our kisses when his fingertips touched my breasts and he figured out that my bra was not there.

"Emilia.", his voice almost a whisper. "I want you."

  He picked up my now shirtless body and allowed me to wrapped my legs around his waist.

  He pressed me into the wall once again and pushed hard his core against mine. I immediately felt his desire for me and a moan escaped then from my mouth.

  I removed his T-shirt with a fast move and pulled him in for one more kiss. My hands touched his perfectly shaped stomach and then went down, finding his sweatpants. I gently tugged at it with one hand, putting slowly the other in, without stopping the eye contact.

We locked eyes as I found what I was looking for. I closed my fingers around it and he released a deep groan, losing completely the control.

  His head flew back as I started moving my palm in and out, a now louder moan escaped from his swollen lips.

"Fuck!", he clenched his jaw and picked me up once again, walking us to his bed.

  He kicked his sweatpants off and laid me onto the bed. He stopped kissing me for a moment, staring at my eyes and caressing my cheek and jaw. That perfect smile on his face, that rare smile. I couldn't resist and smiled back at him. "What?", I said, panting.

His smile faded. "I love you."

 I hadn't the chance to respond as he suddenly took my lower lip between his teeth and then kissed me passionately, taking my breath away. I felt his hand on my belly, going down for my shorts. He tugged at it and took it off, with my panties as well, throwing them on the floor.

  He placed himself between my legs, his one hand caressing my leg, from my ankle to my thigh, lifting it gently at the same time in a slow move.

"Kit.", I whispered as I tried to swallow, my throat dried up. "I need you."

  Without any second word, he crawled over my body and thrust himself inside of me so fast, surprising both of us with that move.

"Oh god.", I whimpered, my body's shaking with pleasure. I found his neck, applying small kisses and bites on it, as my nails was scratching his back. " _Don't stop._ "

  Kit became more aggressive, pushing hard inside of me, fast and deep. I closed my eyes tight as my head flew back on the pillows, my mouth open in ecstasy without any sound coming out of it. I was almost there.

"You are mine.", he said between the thrusts, taking my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him. "Cum for me, Emilia."

"Kit...I'm..." I did not finish the sentence as the words seemed insignificant compared to the feeling that I had the moment I reached my climax.

"Fuck, Em!", he groaned, finding his climax too, at the same time.   
  He slowed down the rhythm of his hips, we both were panting uncontrollably.

  He pulled his member out and collapsed next to me. I couldn't speak. We remained a few minutes in silence, completely naked, looking at the ceiling.

  Kit turned his head to me and smiled at his view. "Hey.", he stretched a hand to my direction. "Come here."

  I accepted his offer and snuggled in his arms, with my head upon his chest.

"You know what?", he started telling me, smelling and playing with my hair with his fingertips.

"What?", I smiled and turned my head to look into his eyes.

"I think that I'm the happiest man in the whole world."

  I blushed furiously, causing him to chuckled and kissed my forehead. The butterflies are filling my stomach.

The morning light creeping in the room.  _I don't want this to end. Never._

 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

**_*buzz buzz*_ **   
  


 

 

My phone was ringing, drawing my attention that was on the TV seconds before. A smile came up to my face as I saw the name on the screen.

"Hello?"

" _Emilia! I'm so glad to hear your voice!_ "

"Hey Nath gurl! How are you?"

" _I'm fine, hun! I just arrived for the party. On my way to the hotel actually._ ", she said chucking.

"Oh, that's great! I'm already here, I arrived a few hours ago."

" _Really?! Well that's awesome, I thought that you won't come, Em!_ "

"Believe me, I was thinking the same.", my fingertips are playing with the duvet.

" _You did right that you came, I missed you gurl!_ "

"I missed you too Nath!" I looked at the clock on the wall. "I have to go now, somebody needs to be presentable for tonight." I forced a smile.

" _Okay, I'll do the same. See you soon, baby girl!_ "

"Bye!" I hung up the phone and placed it on the bed in from of me.

 

 

It's a party. Our wrap party. We supposed to have fun tonight. My beloved co-stars will be there, and I so much want to see them again. _What could go wrong?_


	9. ~Can I be the one?~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! The next chapter is here and I hope that it worth the wait <3 And remember once again, every story is better with a bit of music! I'm looking forward to your thoughts on this part! I'm also really curious about the songs that you chose to hear reading it :) So leave a comment with the name of them if you want. Also, this part contains mature adult situations, please read at your own choice. Follow me on Instagram, @dragonsbone_ , for news of the story and more. Enjoy!

  ~~~~

* * *

**~•flashback•~**

_February, 2012_

I feel so lucky that I found this apartment. _My apartment! Finally my own space!_ I had to live with three of my friends for a good time, about four years? Well, I had six jobs before Thrones and still the money was not enough. But now things changed. And of course I love my friends, I am not complaining, but it's way better when you're in your place alone, isn't it?  
  And my bathroom is amazing, _ugh!_ A relaxing hot bath in my new bathtub was everything I needed right now. After all that hard work that Kit and I did with the stuff.  
  I left him in the living room about a half an hour ago. He promised me that he'll put my stuff out of the boxes for me to help, like he said yesterday when I went to the market, but when I came back he was sleeping. _Stupid Kitten._

  The whole room had that scent of lavender, which I really adore. I was just sitting there, inside the steam, in front of my mirror in my towel, smelling the relaxing scent and admiring the reflection of my now big bathroom. _So lucky!_

  I putted my pyjamas on, a long-sleeved blue with teddy bears on it that my mum bought me, dried my hair up with a towel and headed to where my lazy boy was, hoping that he didn't fall asleep this time.

  I found him on the couch, reading a book, a great number of boxes around him. I was so busy staring at his beautiful smile on his face to figure out what was actually in his hands. From the moment he realized that I was there, he started reading out loud.

" _I am so happy when I'm with him. He's all I want, and I knew it from the very first moment._ "

My cheeks turned immediately to bright red. I froze, confused about what I should do now that he's reading my secret diary out loud so boldly.

" _He can be so stubborn sometimes and you're not able to change his mind, which is really annoying me, but this rare smile of his makes me forget it all. If only he knew how beautiful this smile makes him look._ "

"Hey! Stop it, this is mine!" I literally ran toward him, trying unsuccessfully to take it from his hands.

His back landed on the couch as I fell upon him. He closed my diary and putted it quickly under his back. Right after his arms encircled my body and he smiled, kissing the tip of my nose.

"Give it to me." I said with a serious face, now a bit angry with him, trapped in his arms and unable to move.

"That smile you mean?", he whispered, showing me one these rare smiles that I love so much.

"Yes. No! Seriously, give it back.", I tried to escape but it was not that easy.

He chuckled and looked down at my body. "Nice pyjamas by the way. So... Emilia."

"Oh shut the fuck up." His grip relaxed and I managed to free myself. "It's my mum's gift for the new apartment." I said sitting on the couch, my hands folded in my chest.

"Then Mrs Jenny has a really good taste." He sat too, my diary now in his hands.

After some minutes in silence, he hit my shoulder with his, as I refused to look at him, and let the book on my lap.

"I found it in one of the boxes. Those with the books." He smiled at me but still I didn't want to turn my head at his direction. "Clarke, you have way too many books!", his smile still on his face. But after a moment, it faded and his gaze fell on the floor, he started to play nervously with his fingers.

"Look, I wanted to put them all out, this was on top and-"

"And you just grabbed it and started reading it without my permission." I interrupted him, now looking at him.

"Kinda..."

"Oh don't give me that puppy-eyes look. Not this time."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I was just so curious about the way you're seeing me."

"Who told you that these are for you?" A smirk appeared on my lips.

"What?", he said, confused. "Of course they are for me. Who else that could be? This handsome man with the rare beautiful smile?"

I rolled my eyes giggling. "I'll only let my children to read it someday. No one else."

"And what about their father?"

"What?" I almost choked.

"Won't you let him read it? Cause I know that he would love to.", his voice calm as he came closer to me.

"And how do you know that?" I smiled at him and felt slightly my blood running on my cheeks.  
_There it is again. The most beautiful smile I've ever seen._

His eyes travels on my face as his palm came up to cup the side of it. "I just know."

~•End of the flashback•~

 

 

 

 

**•+++•**

  
" _Heyy! Where are you?!_ " Her voice was louder than I expected the moment I pressed the green button of my phone. Loud music and people cheering, echoing to my ear.

"I'm late, I know." I said applying mascara on my lashes. "I just fell asleep, I'm on my way, I promise!"

" _You're coming, right?!_ "

"Yes, yes I'm coming.", my fingers started shaking. "Shit.", I said as the brush fell off of my hand and landed in the sink.

" _What?!_ "

"Nothing! It's all okay, I said I'm co-"

" _Emilia?! Is that you?!_ " My eyes became wide as I heard his voice. " _Hello?!_ "

"Yeah! Yes, I am. Where's Nath?"

" _Oh oh, slow down, Clarke. I got it. I'm not allowed for a talk anymore. Okay._ " I heard his laughter and his face popped up in my mind, as if he was here. I felt my blood warming my cheeks and a smile appeared on my face.  
My answer never came as my throat had dried up and I blushed even more cause the awkward moment grew.

" _Give me my phone back, Harington!_ " I let a breath to escape then from my lips as I heard Nathalie's voice again, relieved. " _I'm sorry about that girl, Kit's in a very good mood today._ "

I laughed loudly. "Is he drunk again?"

" _Not yet. But soon he will be if you won't come here now! I swear, I won't carry him!_ "

"Okay, okay! See you in ten!", and by that I hung up the phone, heading to the door of my room.

 

 

 

 

**•+++•**  
  


  The sky was already dark when I came out. The cold's rising, even though it's June and technically, summer. But, no matter what the season is, Belfast was always this way. And I always was in love with that.

  
The car stopped in front of the entrance of the club and I immediately saw it. The Targaryen-Stark sticker was on every window of it. It was not a big surprise for me, as Dave and Dan talked to me about it a few weeks ago and I can say that the signals of the two Houses look pretty good together.  
I walked in. People dancing and laughing on my left and right, a huge stage in front of me and a DJ on it, playing his music for us. I started walking to the bar as I supposed my friends were there drinking a drink of two.

"Emilia! Here!"

I saw Nathalie waving at me from where the bar were and I slowly started approaching her, smiling at her and the people on my way, and stopping to hug a couple of them.

"Hi!", I said excited to see her.

"Hi, Em!" She hugged me tight "Ugh gurl, I'm so happy to see you here! It's been a long time, isn't it?!"

"It is! It's true."

"How are you anyway?", she said, pulling out of our embrace. Her hands on my shoulders.

"Let's just say that things have been better." I forced a smile and then looked her in the eyes.

"Oh I see.", she gave me a sympathetic look. "Well, we are here today to have fun and forget every little problem that we might have, aren't we?" She patted my shoulders playfully and turned to the bar to grab two shots, one of which she gave to me.

We drank it in a breath and then she continued, "At least this is what Kit does today as it seems.", she said laughing.

"Speaking of him, where is he? I thought he was here."

"He is! He is just-" she pointed the direction with her finger, but a frown appeared on her face, "he _was_ right there with Alfie and Maisie. About few seconds ago."

Suddenly, we all heard the DJ on the stage who was speaking now on the microphone. The people around me turned their attention to him. And then I saw him. Right behind the DJ in a blue-green jumper, his hands on the front pockets of his jeans.

"Attention, everyone! I have something important and really rare to announce to you all. The King in the North decided to sing something for us. However, I personally believe that he won't do it for _all of us_ , if I'll speak for the song he chose. Just saying! We cannot say no to the King, can we?"

[ Listen to the song "Can I be him" by James Arthur if you want :) ]

The music started to play. The crowd started cheering and Kit took a few steps forward on the stage. His hands came up slowly to encircle the microphone.

_"You walked into the room and now my heart has been stolen"_

 

 

 

 

 

He lifted his head and looked at the cheering crowd, as if he was trying to find something he lost.

_"You took me back in time to when I was unbroken"_

 

 

 

 

 

"He's unbelievable.", Nathalie said to me while she was giving me an another shot. "Did you know about this?"

_"Now you're all I want, and I knew it from the very first moment"_

 

 

 

 

 

"No.", I said with my eyes still glued on the stage.

_"Cause a light came on when I heard that song and I want you to sing it again"_

 

 

 

 

 

I took the glass from her hand and drank the alcohol like it was water.

"Heyy! Someone wants to have real fun tonight!" Nathalie started laughing as she turned to the bar to order one more round of drinks.

_"I swear that every word you sing, you wrote them for me. Like it was a private show but I know you never saw me."_

 

 

 

 

 

Kit's eyes kept travelling around the room. I need some fresh air. I've to get out now.

_"When the lights come on and I'm on my own will you be there sing it again? Could I be the one you talk about in all your stories?"_

 

 

 

 

 

I froze. And then, he found me.

_"Can I be him?"_

 

 

 

 

 

The music stopped. We were there, looking at each other, just the two of us. His lips parted, a light breath coming out of them in a short, gasping pant.

" _Thank you._ "

   
I felt a hand on my left arm touching me and dragging me into the reality.

"The Mother of Dragons! I'm so happy to see you, Emilia! How are you?"

"Oh! Hi, Maisie! I'm fine!", I said forcing a smile at my beloved friend. "Actually, I needed some fresh air. See you later, okay?" I didn't wait for her answer as I practically ran to the exit.

  As I opened the door, the chilling night air hit my face. I close it quickly and moved to the wall on the right, laying my back on it. I was so in a hurry that I didn't bother to take my jacket with me and now I was only in a thin top. Goosebumps crept and filled my arms as the cold wind was dancing on them.

"I was sure that you didn't take a jacket out here." He approached me and putted his jacket on my shoulders. "You were always doing that."

"Kit.", I wrapped the warm fabric tight around my shivering body. "What are you doing here?"

"What do you mean? I won't let you get cold." He pulled a packet of cigarettes out of his back pocket and lighted up one.

"You said you'll stop smoking."

He chuckled, looking at the ground. "Yes, I did. It's just in process." He hesitated. "Like you said that you will call sometimes." With a smirk still on his face, his hand came up to scratch nervously his perfectly shaped beard.

"Yeah. It's still in process too." I giggled at the night sky. It was so beautiful tonight. So bright and full of stars. Nothing compares to that. Not even the lovely Sunday mornings when the rain's hitting the front window of my apartment, and a warm blanket is waiting for me on the couch.  
  I turned my gaze to Kit, to found him already staring at me, smiling.

"What is it?", I said, smiling back.

"Nothing.", he told me, moving his body on the wall next to me, his eyes still on me.

  I rolled my eyes, giggling. "Grow up finally, Kitten." From the moment I realized what I had said, the air in my lungs suddenly disappeared. I cleared my throat and looked straight.

"Look, Em. She and I have not-"

"No. Not now, Kit." I interrupted him.

  We were standing there for some minutes in silence. We both were looking at the night sky. It's not that I don't want him to speak. Of course I need answers. But, not in that exact moment. It's just too much.  
  I finally spoke.

"Nice try before. I mean, I could do it better, but you did your best and it didn't sound that bad."

He chuckled. "Yeah, sure." He lifted his hand, tugging his fingers on his hair. "You liked it?"

"Yes. I did."

"It was for you.", he said nervously.

  I didn't know how to reply. Every possible answer that was popping up in my head was not just right. I wanted to hug and kiss him, telling him that it was the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. But I know that this is not right. Nothing of that is right.

  He cleared his throat. "Yeah. Anyway." He extinguished the cigarette. "I wanted to show you something. Come on."

"What?"

"Just follow me." He grabbed my wrist and opened the door.

  We were walking in the crowd, loud music echoing to my ears. People were staring at us as we were going through, as confused as I was at that moment.

"Where are we going?"

"You will see." He didn't turn his head to me as we were walking but I could see his smile. "Here we are.", Kit said when we arrived at the stage.

  He freed my wrist from his hand and walked to the DJ's direction. I saw him telling something to him but I could not understand what it was. The DJ then handed him his headphones and Kit turned his head to me, waving and telling me to approach him.  
  I took some steps forward on the stage, reaching him.

"What are we doing up here?!", my voice a bit louder.

"Come here." He pulled me gently from my wrist once again and placed me in front of him. He then putted the headphones on my neck and his hands on my waist.

"You are our DJ now.", he whispered to my ear and, leaning forward, his grip on my waist became stronger.

  That was insane. I could not believe that I was doing this. But, I can admit it. It was making me feel better. Happy even. Something that I had to experience quite a long time. And all of this, mostly because of the person that is bringing me happiness right now.

**•+++•**

  After a while, I gave the headphones to Kit, not willing to keep them longer as my face was burning of embarrassment. I chose to stay by his side instead, applauding and recording some videos and photos, that I'm sure I could easily use as a blackmail tomorrow.

  Suddenly, my phone rang. I looked at the screen and I knew that I had to pick it up. I didn't warn Kit, feared of missing the call, so I just left him on the stage.  
  I walked quickly to the toilets, stopping in the corridor to finally pick it up.

"Hello?"

" _Hi, darling. Is everything alright?_ "

"Hi, mum. Yes, it is." I closed my eyes. "Mum? What about you? Isn't a bit late for you to call? Are you okay?"

" _Oh, yes! Totally fine, hun. You just didn't call all day and I supposed that you had some things to do and couldn't find the time to call. So I decided to call you now. You didn't even text me to say that you arrived safely, Emilia._ "

"I know mum, I'm sorry. I completely forgot." _And she told me to call her. Shit._

" _It's okay, hun._ ", she said calmly. " _Anyway, I gotta go. It's indeed too late now. Goodnight, dear. And have fun wherever you are, I can here the music. Love you._ "

"Love you too. Bye." And with that, she hung up the phone.

"Is everything okay?"

I literally jumped on the sound of his voice.

"Damn you, Kit! You scared me!"

"Well, not as much as you scared me!", he said, his voice louder than it should be, echoing to the empty corridor. I could easily feel his anger. I stepped back, touching a door behind me, our eyes still locked.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to yell at you.", he said approaching me, his voice lower and calmer. "You scared me, I thought something happened to you. You literally ran and I... I lost it." Our bodies almost touching, a few inches apart.

"No, I'm fine. You don't have to worry. Everything is okay.", we stayed there, looking at each other as we were breathing the same air. My heart was beating so fast. I suddenly looked at the ground to avoid his eyes.

"Em." His fingers reached my chin, lifting my gaze to him. "Look at me."

"Kit. Someone could see us. Please."

"I don't care. I don't give a fuck of what people will say, Emilia. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of hiding what I really feel." He claimed my lips without warning. I wanted to pull back, but it was impossible. Suddenly, his hand moved behind me, grabbing the door knob and open it. I almost fell on my back as he opened the door and pulled us in the room.

"What are we doing? They could get in here."

"No, they couldn't.", he said smiling on my lips. "The room is only for Staff." He grabbed me from my waist and putted me on an empty table that was in the room while he was kissing me still. We didn't even bother to turn the lights on.  
  He placed himself between my legs as I touched his chest.  
  I couldn't help to think how much I missed this. How much I missed him.

  His hands pulled my top over my head and threw it to the floor, his teeth then found my neck, biting and sucking gently. I closed my eyes, lost in the moment. At the same time, his fingertips found the buckle of my bra and started to unbutton it slowly.  
  I lost the ability to think. His hot mouth on my throat, his warm masculine hands touching me.  
  He took my bra off, exposing my breasts, and then, he stopped.  
  I was ready to speak, confused, when his lips found my collarbones. Making a line of wet kisses with eyes still burning into mine, his mouth touched my nipple and he sucked wildly. A deep moan escaped from my throat.

"I want you, Em."

  His hands went down to unbutton my pants and one moment to another, the only clothe on me was my underwear.  
  Kit's fingers curl beneath my underwear and, all of sudden, he took it off and slipped his fingers down between us and found my clit.

"You're so wet." he breathes hotly on my nipple, astonished.

  He started rubbing his finger against it, making me moan loudly. He thrusted his finger inside me. He added a second finger and quickened the pace while letting his thumb rub my clit.

"Fuck!", I growled, my mind racing. "Kit-", my breath hitching in my throat.

  My hands went down and bunched his shirt into fists, pulling the fabric tight, forcing him to look at me. He pulled his fingers out of me and lifted them to his mouth. My lips parted in shock, in front of what I see. He thrust his fingers into his mouth slowly, and then putted them out with a loud pop, tasting me. I could not breathe. And then his lips were on mine.  
  I pulled his jumper over his head, and then found his lips again. Right after, I tried to unbutton his trousers, touching the soft skin in my way down.  
  With his pants now gone, he pulled himself out of his underwear and rub it on my core.

"Kit-. Don't tease me-"

  He waste no time and pushed into me. His cock slams into me and we both scream. His thrusts are hard and violent. Being inside of me again, he is making me lose all control. Fuck, this man always makes me lose control.  
  I wrap my arms around his shoulders, squeezing tight. Each thrust, I can hear myself moaning loudly, far too loud.  
  He continues and catches my earlobe between his teeth, slightly biting. I did everything I could to not moan loudly, but it was hard.

"Shhh." He tugged his fingers on my hair, finding my swollen lips once again. He kisses me, swallowing my moans. My legs curl around him and my ankles dig into his backside.

  He screamed my name loudly, as he thrust wildly into me. I'm sure everyone that may walk outside on the corridor right now can hear us. But I don't care. There's no better sound than him calling my name in ecstasy.

  I know we both are close. Release is barely seconds away. We continue to fuck roughly on the table for a few minutes until the explosion came. I felt him spilling his warm seed deeply into me as I try to stifle the loud moan I know wants to escape from me.

"Fuck-" he gasps, resting his forehead against mine. We both were panting uncontrollably.

  I suddenly felt so tired. I placed my forehead on the crook of his neck and he rested his chic on my head. One hand of his caressing my bare back, and the other stroking my hair.

"You know, what I was trying to say outside, is that she and I...We are not together, Em. This happened only for our jobs. Mostly for her, actually."

I lifted my head and looked at him in shock. "What?"

"It's true.", his hand caressing my cheek, "But, I already spoke with her. About the divorce. She took what she wanted. Now I need my life back." He looked at me. "I need _you_ back."

I didn't know what to say. I decided to not speak, I just putted my arms around his waist hugging him and resting my head on his chest. I closed my eyes smiling upon his skin and smelling his unique scent.

"You're tired." It was not a question but I nodded. "Come on. Let's take you to your bed, sleepy head.", he said kissing the top of my head.

   
  He grabbed my clothes from the floor and started dressing me up. My eyelids were way too heavy to lift them. How can someone be that damn nice to a person? He was always surprising me with every move of his, and I'm sure that he'll never stop.

 

 

 

 

 

•+++•  


  As we both were dressed properly, I adjusted my clothes once again and looked at him. "Ready?"

  He smiled at me, took my hand in his, and pulled us out of the room.  
  He didn't even bother to let go of my hand as we were walking between the crowd.

"Where are you two going?", Nathalie said. I was about to answer, but Kit was faster.

"I found her sleeping in the bathroom. I'll escort her to the hotel. Maybe she will sleep on the street if I won't.", he laughed.

"Oh, shut up Harington.", I said annoyed, but I couldn't help to laugh too.

"Okay...", Nath looked both of us. "Well, goodnight to you guys!" She then hugged me goodnight. "Don't you dare to not talk to me about this tomorrow, I warn you.", she whispered to my ear and then pulled back smiling.

I giggled and then Kit grabbed my hand again, guiding us to the exit.  


 

 

 

 

 

•+++•  
  


  Kit opened the car's door for me, and I took his offering hand.  
  I got out of the taxi and we walked to the door of our hotel. Silence around us.  
  We took the lift and I push the button of my floor.

"You're doing that again.", I said to him.

"What?"

"You're staring." A small smirk on my face.

"No. You're wrong.", he said turning his gaze straight and clearing his throat.

"Oh. Am I?"

"Yup. Definitely." He was still avoiding to look at me but a smile appeared on his face.

  I shook my head and laughed, looking at the ground.  
  The doors opened and I putted the key out of my bag as we were walking on the corridor.  
  I unlocked my room's door and we walked in. I closed it behind me and went to my bed. I immediately fell on my back and closed my eyes. My legs still on the floor.

"Hey.", he said, covering my body with his. "Not yet, sleepy head." He kissed the tip of my nose and stand up. "Put on your pyjamas first."

"No. I can't." My eyes still closed.

"Oh, you know you can. Come on." He lifted me and let me down on the floor as I frowned.

  He gave me my pyjamas from my suitcase and forced me to change.

"Better now, isn't it?"

"Just let me sleep finally." I laid my head on his chest, hearing his heart beat. His arms came around me, hugging me tight.

"Okay. Let's go to your bed now, princess." He lifted me in his arms once again and this time he let me on the bed, covering my body with the duvet. He kissed my forehead and turned his back, walking to the door.

"Where are you going?", I said nervously.

"I thought-. You wanted to sleep and I-"

"Can you stay?"

"Yes. Yes, I can." A smile crept up on his beautiful lips as he was approaching me.

  I lay down on the bed as he went under the duvet, hugging me tight from behind. My back was touching his chest, so warm and familiar. He then buried his nose in my hair, inhaling.

"I love you.", his voice barely a whisper.

"I love you too."

I felt so tiny and young in his arms. He held me tight to his body, and it just felt like home, like where it's always safe and comfortable.  
_My home._


	10. ~Dream~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! The 10th chapter of "Bruises" is here!❤ I hope you like it, don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts on this part! Enjoy!

* * *

 

 

_Kit_

  
  _She's so beautiful when she's sleeping. So peaceful and tiny. How could I woke her up? It's just impossible._  
I woke up two hours ago to a little figure sleeping on my chest. I think I'm dreaming. Her unique scent filling my lungs. Her hair so soft under my fingertips. I can see the brunette colour coming back and I just love it. _My Emilia's coming back._  
Even now I can't believe what did happen. I should had told her earlier. _But she's so stubborn, she wouldn't listen to what I had to say. Like she did when we were out of the club last night._  
  I have so many things to say to her now that I know she will listen. That everything was fake. A fake shit for the needs of our careers. Or her career. Rose thought that this could be helpful to us. That people will buy it easily cause we once had something. I won't lie, we had. But a long time ago, and now I don't even know if that is called even _friendship_. I mean, we're not seeing each other often, she's mostly in NYC and I'm in London. There's no time for meetings for me. Our jobs have separated a long time ago. But she said that she will take care of it by telling me to meet her for the world to see.  
  I didn't think that it could cause me so much damage when I agreed to it. I couldn't believe that it could take us apart in that way. I wanted to make things clear to Emilia, but she disappeared after that bloody day and didn't even call to ask me what I'm doing, like she used to do in the past. I know I hurt her. And I'm deeply sorry for that.  
  But now she's here, with me. Wrapped in my arms like a child. And I'll never let her go. _Never again._

  It just started raining. The clouds hides the bright sky slowly, taking the light away. The rain makes small sounds as it fall on the window. I felt her moving in my arms and immediately hugged her more tight, as if I was afraid that she would leave. I touched her hair and started caressing her back. My heart is beating so fast. _She's awake._  
  My hand came up to her little face, and when I touched her cheek, a small smile crept up on the corners of her full lips. Suddenly, she wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tight. And then, my heart stopped.  
  
  
  


_Emilia_   
  
  


 

{I suggest you to listen to "Surpise Yourself" by Jack Garratt}

  
  The sound of raindrops falling on the glass door woke me up. I didn't want to open my eyes. That sound was music to my ears.  
  I felt something touching my hair and stroking gently my neck and back. It took me some time to remember what indeed happened last night.  
  I've never been that happy before. The last week, I was a mess. I didn't even want the see him. But everything is different now.  
  I smiled upon the warmth of the body that was under mine. My head is moving up and down, in the rhythm of his slow breathing. His heart beat is so fast. I can hear it clearly. _Oh my..._  
  His fingertips came up to my face, caressing my cheekbone to my chin. I putted my arms around his body and hugged him tight.

"Morning.", I exhaled, smiling on his chest, my eyes still closed.

"Good morning, princess.", he said caressing my cheek and ear.

"You're here."

"Of course.", he said continuing to caress my face. "Where else would I be?"

  I smiled and lifted my gaze to him. "What time is it?"

"Ten o'clock." He kissed the tip of my nose and I giggled.

"How long have you been awake?", I looked him in the eyes with a small smile on my lips, mirroring his own.

"I don't know, maybe a half an hour or so."

  I could see on his face that he was lying. "And why didn't you woke me up?"

"I didn't want to. You're so beautiful when you're sleeping. So calm.", he trailed his fingers in my hair and I close my eyes. "Besides, I wanted some time to be sure that it's not a dream."

"It isn't, huh?" I laid my head on his chest again, and he chuckled.

"I forgot. Dave and Dan suggested to eat our breakfast together. All the crew."

"Okay, when?", I said, calm.

"At 10:30'am."

  I almost jump. "What?!" I stand up. "Come on. We don't have time! Oh my god, you don't have fresh clothes here. Stand up!" I got the bottom of my pyjamas off and headed to my suitcase for my clothes.

"Wow, easy Clarke!" He got off of the bed and approached me. "Don't panicking. We have time." He whispered to my ear and then hugged me from behind, touching my body with his and kissing my neck slowly.

  I closed my eyes, putting my hands on his. "Kit... We don't-"

  My voice cracked when his fingers touched my underwear, reaching what he truly wanted. His fingertips started moving in small circles, slowly, teasing me. He smiled on my neck, as he was biting it gently.  
  His other hand found its way under my pyjamas, moving to my breasts.

"Oh-", I gasped when his cold hand touched my breast, goosebumps crept all over me.

"Trust me. He have some time. And it's okay if we will be late for once." He moved his fingers lower. "Fuck, and I just started.", he whispered, touching my already damp underwear. He pushed it aside, caressing my entrance with his middle and ring finger.  
  I fisted the sleeves of his jumper and whimper quietly.

_"Emilia? Are you inside?"_

  Her voice dragged me into the reality and I immediately opened my eyes as we both parted.

"Shit.", Kit said, turning his back to me and lifted his hand awkwardly to his hair, putting the other on his waist. We both laughed then.

"Go hide and... take care of yourself in the bathroom, Harington.", I giggled uncontrollably, and took a few breathes trying to calm myself.  
  He approached and hugged me. "You'll pay for this later." He bit my ear and headed to the bathroom. I shook my head laughing and walked to the door of my room.

"Heyy... What's up, Nath?", I said from the crack of the door.

"Good morning, sunshine." She smiled and looked at me with her eyes travelling from my head to my feet. A smirk on her face. "Your smile is glowing! Did anything happen?", she said, looking at me suspiciously.

"Nope." I kept holding the door so she could not see inside.

  And suddenly, we heard a sound as something fell on the floor. Shit. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Well, don't tell me that you adopted a cat cause this is a horrible excuse. Truly."

  We looked at each other smiling and then started laughing, unable to stop.

"Okay. I'll go now!", she said loudly, looking at the inside. Then lowered her voice to talk to me. "I swear I'll kill you if you don't talk to me about it. I'll be downstairs and waiting for you to come."

"Alright alright, I'll come as soon as I can."

"You better, girl.",she said, lowering her gaze on my body. "Nice underwear by the way." I blushed furiously and she laughed. "Like we said, okay?" And with that she left.

  I closed the door and laid my head and back on it, as I exhaled relieved.

"Is everything alright?", Kit said, trapping me between his body and the door.

"Kit, stop it!" I giggled as he tried to tickle me. I pushed him to the side and escaped, heading to the small table in the corner. I grabbed his phone and jacket and turned back to him.

"Here. Take your things and go to your room."

"You're kicking me out? Oh, you're hurting me." He touched the chest, where his heart is, with his hand and looked at me with a small sad smile on his full lips.

"Oh come on, Harington. You have to change your clothes. You can not go with the same on you. Let alone that we can't go together."

"Then let's stay here. I'll order our breakfast from the room service." He putted his arms around me and kissed the top of my head, breathing my scent. "I know that you love eating in your room."

"Yeah, you're right. But you really have to go now." I opened the door behind him and pushed him outside. "See you later!" I smiled closing the door quickly but he pushed it open and then, he kissed me. It must be a skill. Every time that he's kissing me, he's taking my breath away. "Okay, go!" I broke the kiss, breathless. "Give me fifteen minutes and I'll be there."

"Don't be late, Clarke." He looked at me one last time and left.

  Closing the door, I sat down on the floor and putted my head in my hands. I smiled like a child. What is he doing to me?  
  
  
  
  


**•+++•**   
  


 

"Finally!", Nathalie said to me as I walked out of the lift. She started approaching me, smiling.

 

"Hi, gurl.", I said while I was hugging her. "Where are the others?" My eyes searching for our co-stars.

 

"At the restaurant. Most of them."

 

"Oh. Then we should go there-" I tried to walk but she stopped me by putting her hand on my arm.

 

"Wow not so fast, baby girl! I think that you owe me some explanations. Then we could go."

 

"Okay, okay!", I said giggling, lifting my hands in the air. "Well..."

 

  She came closer. "Well?" Nathalie looked around and then lowered her voice so that only I can hear. "Are you guys together?"

 

"Kinda-"

 

"I knew it!", she yelled.

 

"Shh, be quiet.", I whispered, trying to keep her quiet.

 

  It was then that I felt a hand encircling my waist and pulling me closer. I saw Nathalie's eyes becoming wide, as he kissed the side of my head.

 

"You're late, Clarke.", he whispered to my ear and then walked away before I could have the chance to speak. I turned my gaze to him while he was walking with Alfie and his girlfriend to the restaurant.

 

"Oh, okay! _Kinda._ Yes.", she said to me whispering, excitement clear in her voice.

 

"Stop it!" I then laughed and turned my gaze again to where Kit went, in the direction of the restaurant. "We really should go now. Everyone is there except us."

 

"Sure." A smirk appeared on her face. I shook my head laughing and then started walking to the restaurant, with Nathalie behind, following me.  
  
  
  


 

**•+++•**   
  
  


 

{Listen to the song "Never Not" by Lauv if you want :)}

  
  The place was full of people. The rain has stopped and the now sunlight creeping in the room through the large windows. Delicious smells reaching my nose, makes me feel even more hungry as we were approaching our table.

"God, I'm so hungry.", I whispered as we were walking and Nathalie looked at me and laughed.

"What?", I couldn't not to laugh back at her.

"Nothing.", her smile bright. "It just have been so long since the last time I saw you that happy. When you were yourself. And I'm really happy for you, Emilia."

  I didn't say anything. My smile became brighter automatically and I turned my head to hide my now red cheeks.

He was there, sitting on the table and looking at me smiling. There we go again. _That smile. The smile that always makes me forget everything from the beginning. Damn._  
 

  
We reached our co-stars and sat on the only two empty seats, across Alfie and Kit.  
  Our eyes were locked. It was like we were the only people in the room. And then Nathalie hit me under the table, dragging my attention.

"Ouch!", I complained, obviously annoyed by her move.

"Dan is talking to you!", she whispered leaning her body on mine.

"Emilia, is everything alright?", Dan said to me confused.

  I cleared my throat and looked at him. "Yeah. Yes, everything is fine."

"Alright, then are you okay with that? And Kit of course." He looked at Kit and he seemed as confused as I was at that moment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you said.", he told Dan.

"Oh. I was talking for the scenes that left to film. Actually, they're your scenes. I mean, yours and Emilia's. This is why I'm asking only you two. I'll need you for a couple of days. And I suggest that it's better if we do it now that we already are in Belfast. Are you okay with that?"

"Yeah, of course.", he said leaning his back on the chair.

"Yeah, totally fine.", I answered too.

"Great. We're starting tomorrow.", he turned to the others. "So you guys can return to your homes. We will need only the Targaryens for this, okay?", he laughed clapping his hands.

Everybody agreed with Dan.

_***buzz buzz*** _

  My phone buzzed in my pocket.

_K: Well, it's just the two of us as it seems, huh?_

I lifted my head to find him smiling at me from his seat, while no one was looking. I nodded and smiled back at him.

_E: Only in your dreams, Harington._

  A frown appeared on his face while he was reading my text and then turned to look at me confused. I couldn't resist to laugh loud, dragging the attention of my co-stars, but also of the people around us. I blushed and hid my red face in my hands giggling.  
  The next two days will be full of surprises, _I'm sure about that._

 

 

* * *

 


	11. ~Goodbye~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I know that this chapter came quite late, BUT, now it is here and I hope it worth the wait <3 Remember that every story becomes better with music, so put your playlist on and enjoy! Don't forget to leave a comment about your thoughts, you are the greatestmotivation for a writer. Enjoy!

~~~~

* * *

 

"Kit?"

" _Mmm_."

"Wake up."

  I looked at my phone for the time. _07:30'_ in the morning. Dan told us to meet him downstairs at eight o'clock. Today is the day we'll go to the set to film our last scenes. _Just him and I._

"We have to go downstairs, Kit. Get out of the bed.", I whispered on his naked chest with eyes closed, as I return to my previous position.  
  His hands came around my bare body and hugged me tight as he rested his chic on the top of my head and exhaled heavily.

"Just five more minutes."

"No, seriously. Come on, Kitten." I kissed him, causing him to smile. I chuckled. I took the duvet off of me and got out of the bed, heading to my clothes.  
  I putted my bra and an underwear on and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth.  
  The floor was cold under my bare feet. I shivered, putting a bath robe around my body.  
  We had so much fun the previous night. It was a mini goodbye-party. Our co-stars will leave in a few hours and then we'll be here by ourselves. Well, not exactly the two of us. David and Dan will be here too, with the escort of the crew.  
  I can not even remember what time we came back to my room. Fortunately, I forced Kit to bring some fresh clothes to my room last night before we went to the pub, so that things would be easier this morning.  
  David warned us to get some rest and sleep cause _tomorrow's scenes are important for the show_ , like he said. Well, Kit had other plans. And I figured it out at the moment that I opened the door. I doubt if I slept for two hours. I feel so tired. _Ugh_.  
  I'm feeling weird this morning. Like I know that something is wrong here. Or something bad is going to happen. Probably it's all in my head.  
  I washed my face and dried it with a towel. But when I turned the water off, I heard him. I left the towel on the counter in front of me and approached the door of the bathroom slowly.

"You know that you're wrong in this one."

  There he is. Now standing up, and already wearing his trousers, leaving his perfectly shaped chest naked.

"No! You can not do that, Rose. You do not have the right to."

  _Rose_. I suddenly felt my stomach twisting. I put my hand upon it, as if I could feel better with that move, and approach even closer.

" _Oh, yes I can, Kit. I'm still your wife._ "

  He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes tight, exhaling heavily.

"We both agreed to something, Rose. You know it. You even signed up for it. This could never happen. What I've done, I did it to help you."

" _No, Kit! Now is you who's wrong here. We could still make it work. We could still make our family. We are family, Kit. But you're too blind to see that. Well, I'm wondering why now. Tell me, you are with her, right?!_ "

  _Oh my god._ The twisting of my stomach became stronger, causing me to search for the wall to find my balance again. _Does she knows about me? Of course she does. She always knew._

"I had enough! That's non of your business! Besides, I could be with anyone I want to be, without asking for your permission, for God's sake!"

" _Do not bother to give me an answer. I just got it. Do you think that I am a fool?! Actually Kit, you are the fool one! You couldn't even shut your mouth up in our wedding day. But your beloved one is always on your mind, isn't she? She basically was the first one you invited for that day. I can clearly remember. You were so fucking nervous, thinking if she would come or not. Your best friend, am I right?_ "

  I felt so guilty. I wanted to throw up at that right moment. _What if I am the one who's falling them apart? They were together some years ago. Really together. They could still be. They got married. What if-_

"Enough! I'm tired of this! She has nothing to do with that! Could you please, just for one fucking time, behave like your actual age?! What's wrong with you?!"

" _What's wrong with me?! I'm not the one who is trying to give an end to our marriage!_ " There was a pause. " _Look Kit. Let's just start over again. From the beginning. Just like before, when we both were happy with our lives. Especially now that we are married._ "

  A single tear ran then on my pale cheek. I didn't realized that I was crying.  
  I can understand her. She loves him, I can see that. And now, she's losing him. _How can I be so cruel?_

"I can not do this again, Rose. This just can't happen. It's over, a long time ago. Listen to me, I don't want to argue with you anymore, I'm really tired of it. I have to go now, we will talk again soon for the details. Goodbye, Rose." And with that, he hung up the phone.

  He threw his phone on the bed and leaned his body on the glass door, looking at the view outside.

  I couldn't appear like this. I went back to the bathroom and closed the door behind me. Washing my face again, I was thinking of what I just saw and heard. _What am I supposed to do now?_  
  Fortunately, my stomach's not turning any longer, but I still feel guilty.  
_I don't think that he noticed me. It's better this way._  
  I got out of the bathroom after I did my make up, and almost ready to go downstairs.

"Hey.", he said approaching me for a hug. "What happened? I thought that you slept in there." He flashed a warm smile and placed his arms around my body, hugging me tight and kissing the top of my head.

  I said nothing. My hands were stuck between him and I. I couldn't move, afraid that I'll break again.  
  He put his hand on my cheek and looked me in the eyes.

"Is everything alright?", he said worried.

"Yes. Yeah, everything is fine." I avoided his gaze and turned to dress up, clearing my throat. "Please, dress up. We have to go."

  His mouth opened and closed again, as if he wanted to say something that he was not able to spell. He then turned his back to me, reaching his jumper.

•+++•

 

"Finally, guys!", Dan said when he saw us coming. "It's good to see you both together at the same time, synchronisation is everything. Especially on a day like this one." He clapped his hands and continued. "So. Are you ready for today? I hope you slept enough." Kit and I laughed then and Dan looked at us confused but also smiling.

 

"Good morning to you too, Dan.", I said giggling.

 

"The car is ready to take us to the set. I'm sorry for the breakfast but we don't have much time. You will eat while the crew is preparing you for the scenes.", David said approaching the three of us.

 

"Oh don't mind, we will survive.", Kit told him and then he nodded to me to walk to the direction of the door, smiling.

 

"Speak for yourself, Harington.", I said looking at him, before I started walking to the door of our hotel.

 

  I did as told, with the three men following me to the car. _Big day today. And for me, it has already started._

 

•+++•

 

  The road seemed unexpectedly long this time. Kit was looking at me the whole time from the seat next to me, trying to figure out what was actually wrong.  
  _He didn't notice me. I'm sure about that. He doesn't know that I know._ Maybe he suspects it, I guess. _But, is he planning to talk about it?_ He may think that it's not something important at all. _Well, he's wrong in that._

 

"We're here, guys.", David said as the car got in the driveway of the set.

 

  I picked up my phone and bag, and went out of the vehicle as soon as it stopped.  
  The three men followed my moves and did the same, Dan thanking the driver for the ride.

 

"Okay, so.", Dan said looking at both of us, "Kit, you can go to your trailer, the crew will be there in any minute," and then his eyes landed to me. "And Emilia, your hairstylists and make-up artists are already in your trailer."

 

"Great.", I said smiling.

 

"And, before I forget it, I want you both in the closet room for your costumes in two hour. Emilia, you have to come a bit earlier so that we will have more time to adjust the prosthetics."

 

  _Oh great, and I completely forgot about that._  
"Yes, of course."

 

"Good. See you later, guys!" Dan and David left us alone and I started to feel panic for no reason.  
  I turned to leave but he grabbed my arm, forcing me to look at him.

 

"Em? Are you okay?", he said as he came closer.

 

"Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry." I looked him in the eyes.

 

"No, you're not. I know you, Emilia." His hand came up to cup the side of my face. "You are pale.", he whispered.

 

"It's probably nothing." I swallowed uneasy, with my eyes still stuck in his. "Kit, please don't. Someone could see us."

 

"Do not try to lie to me, miss Clarke.", he told me, avoiding what I said. His eyes searching for a sign on my face. "I can speak with Dan. We can shoot our scenes tomorrow if you will feel better."

 

"I said I'm okay. We will finish this today." I escaped from his hands as gently as I could.

 

"Okay...", he said awkwardly. "Well, see you soon?"

 

"Yes.", my eyes on the ground.

 

  Suddenly, he came closer to me and putted his arms around me, hugging me tight.  
  I closed my eyes tightly, trying so hard to avoid the pain I feel, immersed in an embrace that I hadn't realized how much I needed at that right moment.  
  He kissed the top of my head and let me free again.

 

"Goodbye.", I said turning my back to him after some seconds. I didn't bother to look back. I knew that he's looking at me and I couldn't do anything else but keep walking straight to my trailer. My stomach's twisting again. _Perfect._

 

•+++•

 

"Emilia! Hey sweetie!"  
"The Mother of Dragons is here, guys!"  
"Hello!"  
My lovely crew came to me to greet me as I opened the door of my trailer.

 

"Hi, guys! How are you all doing?!", I looked at each one of them with a bright smile.

 

"We're doing great, sweetie.", said my make up artist and hairdresser, Candice. She stopped and looked at me closer. "Although, I can not say that for you too."

 

"No, I'm fine. Just a bit tired.", I shook my head and forced a smile. I took my seat in front of the mirror.  
  The moment I lifted my head and saw my reflection, I realized what everyone was talking about. _I look like a mess._ The skin of my face looks pale, more than ever before. My eyes are a little swollen and my nose has a fade shade of red, betraying my attempt to keep my tears back.  
  With a twisting stomach, I shifted in my seat and cleared my throat. My eyes fell on the floor, refusing to look at the mirror again.

 

"I didn't sleep so well last night, that's all."

 

"Oh. Okay, hun.", she said approaching my seat. She looked at my reflection in front of her and placed her hand on my shoulder gently, causing me to lift my gaze to her. I smiled weakly.  
  All eyes were on me. I suddenly felt so weak. I felt so small. _Can I go now? Of course I can't. I have to behave like a professional. Cause I am one. Come on, Emilia. Get this done and leave._ I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself.

 

"So.", my hairstylist Kev said, clapping his hands. "We better get to work, shall we?", he smiled to me and turned his back to pick his things up, so that they can start working on me.  
  Candice started with my hair, brushing it and then making the little braids that they always were making, so that they can put Daenerys' wig on my head.

 

  _I'm impressed by the way that things can change in a single day. Or just a few seconds. I remember I was so happy the previous day. All that laughter. The joy. Seems so far now._  
_And this morning. I woke up in the arms of his. So familiar and warm. My home._  
_I feel so fucking guilty just thinking of it. That phone call made me understand her. I felt pain, as I feel now too. But I understand._  
_It seems that she truly loves him. I'm feeling like I betrayed her. I'm putting myself in her shoes. I could never stand it if something like that would happen to me. A "third wheel". This is how I'm feeling right now. The third one._  
_I wish this was a lie. A perfect lie. If only we hadn't broke up back then, when we were younger and our only problem was the distance between us. Maybe we would still be together. What if-_

 

"Emilia hun?". Kev's voice dragged me into reality and I shook my head nervously, as if I wanted to delete these thoughts that encircle my mind.  
  I lifted my gaze in the mirror and saw that Kev was holding the wig, probably waiting to put it on my head. Candice had already made the little braids.

 

"I'm sorry, I was thinking of something."

 

  They looked at me and then they looked at each other for some seconds, as they could speak with their eyes. _Great._

 

"Okay beauty, we're going to do this one last time, huh?", he said putting the wig on me carefully.

 

"Yeah, I guess.". I smiled weakly.

 

"You're gonna miss it, aren't you?"

 

"It's true.", I looked at my hands. "I mean, I'm doing this for so many years. I practically grew up with Daenerys. I'll lose a part of me."

 

"Aww, that's so sweet, Em.", Candice said from behind, while she was preparing the make up products that she's going to use on me.

 

  _Actually, I'll lose more than I thought._

 

  Time passed quickly, and from a moment to another, I was ready to go to the closet room. I looked at the mirror one last time, missing already what I'm gonna lose.

 

"Thank you, guys. You've done an amazing job, as always." I smiled sadly at them.

 

"The pleasure is ours, your Grace.", Kev said, hugging me. "Send my regards to the King in the North.", he told me playfully as he let me free.  
My smile faded instantly and the nausea came back in that exact moment. I said nothing.  
  I hugged each one of them and opened the door, heading to where Dan told me to find him.

 

**•+++•**

 

"Dan? Is this size okay? You told me it has to be a five-month, didn't you?", Kathryn, my stylist, said to Dan as he came in the room.

 

"Yes, it's perfect. Please give her the cloak to put it on. Then she's ready. We are in the North, right?". He chuckled and turned to go to the other corner of the room.

 

  I nodded and then turned my back to him, putting the cloak, that Kathryn gave me, on me.  
  _My costume is so beautiful. They truly did a great job for this season. The Targaryen colours decorating it one more time in the greatest way. Mostly black, with delicate details of red and grey._  
_My belly looks cute, actually. It seems real even_ , I thought, putting my hand on the prosthetic and started caressing it, examining its size.

 

"It suits you."

 

  I froze. Thinking that I was alone, I lifted my head to see Kit, in Targaryen colours too, entering the room with a small smile on his full lips and a light shade of red on his face, as if he's feeling ashamed of what he just said.

 

  I cleared my throat and adjusted the cloak. "What?"

 

"The costume.", he said with the smirk still on, coming dangerously close to me. His smile then replaced immediately by a serious mask as we locked eyes. Our bodies inches apart.

 

"And this."  
  He placed his hand on my fake pregnancy belly and said nothing more.  
I can instantly feel my cheeks burning, no make up can hide it. My throat suddenly dried up.

 

"Great job, guys. I want this on the set too. It's good to see that you have some time for a rehearsal. Keep going.", Dan said as he was passing by, holding the scenarios, not even looking at our direction.  
  I blushed even more and took a step back, looking at the ground.

 

"We're almost ready, please follow me.", he kept walking, letting us alone behind.

 

"We- we should go."

 

"Ladies first.", he motioned to me.  
I shook my head to clean my thoughts and started walking, following Dan on the set.

 

**•+++•**

 

"Action!"

 

  The first scene starts in Jon and Dany's room in Winterfell. I took my place in front of the large window, staring at the snowing sky.  
  Two hands touched my waist and started encircling my waistline. He hugged me and rested his hands on my belly, stroking it gently.

 

"Hi.", he whispered to my ear.

 

"Hi.", I closed my eyes smiling and placed my hands on his.

 

"How are you feeling?"

 

"I'm better now." I turned my head so that I can look at him. My eyes dropped to his lips. _He is so beautiful. And so close._  
  My pulses started increasing. _Focus, Emilia_. I returned my gaze to the window.

 

"Do you still feel pain?"

 

"No. I'm fine."

 

"Dany.", he took his hands from my body and flipped me around slowly to see my face. "Do not lie to me. This is serious." He placed his hand on my belly one more time. "I want you both to be safe. You two are my whole life, I can not think that something bad could happen. I could send a maester to see you. Maybe-"

 

"Jon.", I interrupted him, putting both of my hands on his face and forced him to look me in the eyes. "We are fine. I promise." I took my hands from his face and let them fall on each side of my body.  
  Suddenly, one of his hands came up slowly, resting on my cheek. His thumb caressing my cheekbone while his gaze dropped to my lips. _What is he doing? This is not in the scenario-_  
  His lips found mine. And then, nobody else was there. Just him and I.  
  I forgot about everything. I don't really care where I am or what I'm doing. I know that this is completely wrong, something that I can not do anymore. _I wish things were different. But they're not._  
  I broke the kiss, resting my forehead on his. My eyes were still closed, as I was trying to calm the rythmn of my breathing.

 

"I love you.", he said after some seconds, surprising me.

 

"I love you, too.", I finally said, my voice almost a whisper.

 

"Cut!", Dan yelled from the other corner of the room, causing us to part. "Thank you guys, that was incredible!" He got in the set and came to where we were standing.  
"Amazing!", he said still amazed by the scene. "But, guys, you better inform me about the changes the next time. Kit, try to follow the scenario, okay? It was great, yes. But please try.", he patted him on the shoulder, smiling, and got back to the cameras to check what they've done.

 

"It was not necessary.", I whispered to him, looking at the crew.

 

"And what if I wanted to do it? Or I just could not avoid it?", he came closer, standing in front of me and blocking my view.

 

"Then you should learn to control yourself.", I said, serious.

 

"I could try.", he told me, fixing my cloak.

 

"Thank you."

 

"No problem."  
  We stayed there for some seconds, just looking at each other.

 

"Okay. I can admit that I liked your version, guys. But let's do this again, like the original scenario this time, you know, just in case.", Dan yelled at us, practically telling us to take our places on the set again.  
  We did as told and the cameras were one more time on us.

 

~~~

 

  Everything went well. We finished filming pretty quick. Kit tried numerous times to speak to me between the breaks, but he never had the chance for the answers that he was looking for. This can not happen here.  
  _I want to leave. I can not talk with him about it. I don't even know how to start._ I came to my trailer, change to my clothes and took my wig off. _I have to go before he'll come to find me again._  
  I gathered my things. I can see through the window that the day's light is fading away slowly as the bright sun goes down. The sky has already that beautiful pink-gold colour that anybody could fell in love with.  
  I took a deep breath and grabbed my bag and phone, heading to the door of my trailer. _Shit-_

 

"Why are you avoiding me all day long?", he said, breaking in my trailer and literally sending me to the other corner of the room.

 

"What?! No, I'm not!", I said, letting my bag fall from my shoulder, grabbing the counter behind me with both of my hands.

 

"Yes, you are!" He approached me, meeting the level of my eyes. "Emilia." He touched my cheek with his fingertips, as his eyes travels on my face. "Is that something that I did? Please tell me. Cause I really didn't realize it and I'm terribly sorry if I hurt you. Please."

 

"Kit.", I whispered with watery eyes. "It's nothing."

 

"You're lying again.", he said. "And we both know that you are a terrible liar, Em." He flashed a sad smile, a tear is threatening to fall.

 

"Don't do this." It's too late to hide my emotions. And too pointless, in front of a person who knows me so well.

 

"What could change in a day? You looked so happy the previous one. As I did. You're not even looking at me anymore." He lifted my head slowly, forcing me to take my eyes from the ground and meet his own.

 

"A lot could change.", I said as a single tear ran then on my pale cheek.

 

**_*knock knock*_ **

 

  He took a step back and I immediately wipe my tears off, looking at the floor.

 

"I have some good news.", Dan said, entering the trailer and closing the door behind. "Oh, you both are here. Great.", he looked at me and Kit. Confusion appeared on his gaze, but he kept going. "We won't need you tomorrow, we're done. We finished this quicker than I thought. The scenes are great, no need to keep you here any longer. You're free to return to your homes."

 

"That's great." I felt relieved.

 

"You can go back to your rooms, get some rest. Thank you for your amazing work today and always, guys.", he said heading to the door again. "See you soon." And with that he left.

 

  Suddenly, the air in the room became heavier. Kit was standing in front of me, with his back to my direction. His right hand was buried in the base of his hair, massaging awkwardly the back of his neck.  
  Some minutes past in silence, but it felt like centuries. I didn't know what to do.

 

"Pfff." He exhaled heavily, turning to face me. He then took two steps forward and took me in his arms in a tight hug, cupping my head with one of his hands. I closed my eyes trying to keep my tears from falling and my hands went automatically around his waist.  
  We stayed like that for some minutes, none of us wanted to part. He brought his lips to my forehead and kissed me.

 

"Come on. We will talk later, you're tired. You should get some rest." He let me free and picked up his phone. "I'll be in the car. Come when you're ready." He looked at me once again and left.

 

  _He figured it out. He now knows that I know about the phone call. I'm sure. One thing left for me to do now._

 

**•+++•**

 

  I'm lying on my bed for an hour now. The night has come. The moon's illuminating the dark sky, as I visibly can notice through the window.  
  _I just know that if I'll get out of this room, everything will be different from now on. But it can not be worse, can it?_  
  I promised to him that I'll meet him soon to talk. He's probably waiting for me still.

 

_~We could still make it work. We could still make our family. We are family, Kit. But you're too blind to see that.~_

 

Her words dancing on my head.

 

_~Let's just start over again. From the beginning. Just like before, when we both were happy with our lives.~_

 

  I jumped out of the bed and grabbed a black jumper, matching with my black ripped jeans. _This is not fair. I'm not that kind of a person, and I'll never be._  
I dressed up and got out of the room, holding only my key.

 

**•+++•**

 

"You came.", he said, holding open the door of his room in front of me.

 

  I just nodded, looking at the ground, with my hands touching my elbows, embracing my body.  
  I walked inside, still looking at the floor of his room.

 

"I thought that you wouldn't come." He put his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

 

"I promised you, didn't I?"

 

"You did."

 

  I wanted to scream and cry, both at the same time. No word is willing to come out of my mouth so easily.  
  I took a deep breath and started to speak.  
"Kit, look.", I said lifting my head. "I- I was there when-"

 

"I know.", he interrupted me. "I know that you were there. Well, I figured it out later." His eyes no longer meeting mine.  
"I saw how you were looking at me right after you came out of the bathroom. I wasn't sure at first. I was wishing to be wrong. But I noticed your behaviour when we were on the set too." He came closer and placed his hands on each side of my face, forcing me to look at him. "Em. Whatever is coming out of her is a lie. Please understand that."

 

"No, Kit! It's not." I pulled his hands off of my face and took a step back. "She loves you. She truly does. I just can't do this." Tears started filling my eyes, falling one by one on my pale cheek.

 

"Emilia." He took a step forward and lifted his hand to my face, wiping my tears with his thumb. A single tear ran then on his cheek. "Believe me. She doesn't even care about me. We agreed to do this for a reason, she needed to grow her career." He cupped my face once again with both of his hands. "She's just now trying to get as much as she can by blackmailing me and hurting me. Listen to me. Please."

 

"I can't.", I whispered to him, as a fresh river of tears falls on my face.

 

"She's lying. She can't stand that I now have what I wanted and she doesn't. I have you, and she has not what she was looking for. I tried to help her with that marriage but I failed. I'm tired of it. This is why I spoke to her about the divorce. I just want to be with you finally."  
  He looked at me and brought his lips to mine, kissing me slowly. I held his jumper in my fists and kissed him back. _One last time._  
  We broke the kiss and I put my forehead on his chest. Kit's hand encircled my body tight.  
  I felt pain. I know that this is not possible, but I could swear I heard my heart ripping into pieces at that right moment. I'm not sure if I could even get it whole soon again.

 

"This can not work.", I murmured on his chest. "I can't do this, Kit."

 

"Please, don't say that. Believe me." He hugged me tighter and started stroking my hair.

 

_But, what is done, is done. Right?_

 

"I have to go.", my voice cracked. I took two steps back, breaking our embrace.

 

"No! Em, stay here. We will talk in the morning, we both are tired now to speak."

 

"I can't. My flight is early in the morning."

 

"But- I thought we agreed to return home together.", he said confused.

 

  I just looked at him, hugging myself, ready to cry again. _I must go_. He then tried to come to me again and touch me, but I moved away.

 

"Don't go.", he said in a cracked voice, watching me walking to the door. "Emilia."

 

  I opened the door and froze at the sound of my name. I took a deep breath, trying unsuccessfully to keep my tears from falling.  
"Goodbye, Kit.", I said, not even daring to look at him. And then, the door closed behind me and I knew that I lost everything.  
  I started walking to my room. I heard something break then, but I didn't want to stop. _I made my decision. Even if it's the worst thing I have ever done in my life, it's for good. They already are a family. I'm not the one who will wreck it._

 

  The way to my room seems extremely long tonight. The walls are caving in and the oxygen is running out. The twisting of my stomach came back.  
_I'm alone._

 

* * *

* * *

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here it is! The next chapter came. My exams are over sooo... I hope it worth the wait <3 Remember that every story becomes better with music, so put your playlist on and enjoy! Don't forget to leave a comment about your thoughts, you are the greatest motivation for a writer. Enjoy! <3

* * *

  
  


  The sound of the birds flying upon my head is so peaceful. The Italian sun is warming my body. It was exactly what I needed right now. Away from my responsibilities and work. Somewhere I could finally breathe. Away from reality.  
  _August._ I hadn't realized how the last month passed. July was not really gentle to me, emotionally. Fortunately, my friends got me out of that cloud and brought me here. An actual paradise. I can not understand why I refused at first.  
  _A whole month without a single sign of him._ Besides, this is how things should have been from the beginning. _Right...?_  
  He tried to find me a couple of times. I won't lie. But I never picked up the phone. I know that if I will, this shit will start all over again. I'll hurt him and myself again.  
  I don't know how long I'm laying down here, on the warm sand of this amazing beach. I opened my eyes and just then I realized that clouds were covering slowly the sun that previously was shining for us all. Small raindrops started falling on my body.

"Em! Emilia?!" My best friend Lola was calling me from the porch of our villa behind me.

"I'm coming!", I shouted back at her and wore my dress, gathering my towel and sunglasses, as I saw her getting in. I climbed the stairs and got in the house through the glass door.

"What were you doing all this time outside, Em? The weather is getting worse.", she asked me, from the kitchen at my right.

"Oh, I didn't notice.", I said, approaching the counter and sat on the stool, as I put a grape in my mouth.

"You didn't noticed? Are you kidding me?" She stopped cutting the fruits in front of her and looked at me.

"Yeah- no, I'm not. I was thinking."

"You fell asleep you mean.", a smirk appeared on her face.

"Shut up! I didn't!", I said, laughing.

"Look who remembered us! Miss the-sun-is-my-friend! How lovely!", my friend Oliver said, grabbing an apple in front of me.

"Oh come on! Who can resist such a lovely weather?!", I told him frowning, pointing the glass door with my hand.

"Emilia.", he stopped and turned to look at me. "It's raining."

"Yeah? Well, it wasn't before.", I said, defending myself with a sad smile on my face.

"I- Oh my god, whatever.", he said turning his back to us and heading to the other room of the house, where the dining table was. "Just you two come to the table, dinner is ready." And then he disappeared, with the apple still on his hand.

"Okay! Let's go then." I told to her, giggling, and stood up to go inside.

"Emilia.", Lola stopped me. Something in the tone of her voice made me to freeze and I stopped without turning to look at her.  
"He called again."

  I closed my eyes and replied to her, my back still on her view.  
"Oh."

"Yeah..." She approached me. "Emilia-"

"We better go inside. They are waiting for us.", I interrupted her and after some seconds and started walking to where our friends were.  
  
  


**•+++•**   
  


  
"Oh my god, guys, this is delicious.", I said, preparing one more bite to eat with my fork.

"You like it? It's a new recipe.", my friend Gracie said, smiling.

"Yeah!"

"I'm happy to see you're eating again like a human.", Lola said, laughing with our friends.

"Well, don't get used to it.", I teased her with a smirk, and she laughed, as I continue to eat.

"Hey, did you guys see those photos of the King in the North?! Honeymoon in Japan? He dissapointed me. Look.", one of my friends said turning the screen of his phone to all of us.

  I heard what George said, and suddenly I stopped eating. I froze, looking at my dish.  
  I feel everything and nothing at the same time, I don't know how to act. I wish that I was dreaming and somebody would come to wake me up.  
  I lifted my head and my eyes met Lola's.

"Yes, me too! I was expecting Iceland to be honest!"  
"I know right? Besides, I thought that he was a romantic guy. And Japan, the fish market? Not even close to that."  
  _Fish what-_  
"Truly, I agree."  
My friends kept speaking about him, and I really can't think a good excuse to disappear and not be a part of this conversation.

"Emilia. Emilia will tell us how is he." They turned to look at me. All of them. _Shit-_  
"I mean, I believe you know him quite well after all this years of filming together."

"Oh come on, George! They weren't filming together until the seventh season!", Lola said interrupting me, as she leaned on her chair and I never felt so thankful.

"Yeah but we all know what a good friendship they have!"

"Okay, enough! We're not here to talk about Kit, right?"

"You're not funny, Lola.", George said turning his gaze from Lola to the others, starting a new conversation.

" _Thank you._ ", my lips moved without sound and she smiled to me across the table.

  I sat there in silence, until the end of our little party. The more I'm trying to keep him out of my mind, the more difficult it becomes every day.   
  _So far away from me, yet always here. Damn it._  
  
  
  


**•+++•**   
  


  
_Kit_  
  


"Come on!", I shouted, throwing my phone beside me on the bed and placed my head on my hands, burying my fingers in my hair.  
  I'm sitting on the bed of my hotel room. _Alone._ I told her that today I will leave. I can't do this one more day. I hate lies. She brought me here, wanting everyone to believe in that Honeymoon shit. _Enough._ I'm packing my things.  
  I tried to reach her. But she never picked it up. I hurt her, and that is hurting myself more. I hadn't the opportunity to explain, as she left that night without letting me to. I couldn't go after her cause I know her, and I know that things would be much worse then. She always needs time. _But I can not stay away from her for so long. I never could._  
_So now I have my suitcase in front of me. It's time to get out of here. And mostly, to get out of this lie._  
  I started putting my clothes in the luggage and after some minutes I'm finally ready to go. I bent over to close it, when I heard the door opening.

"What- what are you doing?"  
Rose got in and froze when she saw me.

"I'm leaving.", I said without looking at her. I close my suitcase and stood up to face her.

"You're doing what? You can not just leave!", she yelled at me, becoming more and more upset.

"Oh yeah? Watch me.", I told her, moving the luggage in front of the door of the room and turning back to the bed again to pick my other things like my jacket and phone.

"Are you serious right now, Kit?! This is ridiculous!", she approached me and took the jacket off my hand and threw it on the bed again.

"This is ridiculous, Rose?! Really?!", my temperature's rising, I feel my blood running in my head. "I will tell you what is ridiculous! _This_ is ridiculous! All these fake things that I never agreed for, and now I'm losing everything I could ever have, just because of it!"

  I saw fear in her eyes and I instantly forced myself to calm. I close my eyes and took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"What has she done to you?", I barely heard her saying, her voice almost a whisper.

  I lifted my gaze to her and noticed tears in her eyes, threatening to fall on her cheeks. But I noticed one more thing on her face. An expression of disgust.  
"I expected that. I always knew. But I could never imagine that she'd turn you into a pet. Mesmerized by her pretty face."

"What? What are you talking about? She has nothing to do with this!-"

"You see? I didn't even mention her name and you already know to whom I'm referring.", she interrupted me. "You're so pathetic, Kit."

"Okay, that's enough! I'm done, Rose!" I grabbed my jacket once again and put my phone into my pocket. "I already spoke with my lawyer this morning. He will call yours today or tomorrow. We had an agreement, and you broke it. I agreed to help you with your career, as you did to help me with mine, but that's enough. I won't stay here watching my whole world crashing to the ground around me because of a mistake I made. _We_ made."  
  I took three steps forward and stopped. "I just want you to know that this is happening for good. If we will stay in this way I'll be keeping you back, as you're keeping me back too." I started walking again to my suitcase. I placed my jacket on it and held the handle of the door to go out.

"I hope she'll be proud of it now. She made it. It must be a huge relief for her I guess."

  I turned my head to look at her.  
"She did nothing.", I said calmly. "This situation was over years ago. We were just too blind to find out. That's all." I took a deep breath and looked at her one more time before I leave.  
"Goodbye, Rose.", I said, and the door closed behind me.  
  
  
  


**•+++•**   
  


  
_Emilia_

_A few days later_   
  
  


  My head is killing me. Sleep is something impossible for me lately. But some nights, like this one now, the headache is more intense.  
  I got out of my bed and headed to the kitchen to take some painkillers and a glass of water that I so much need at this right moment.  
  I stepped in and filled a glass with water. I took it in my hand and walked to the glass door. The dark sky is so clear and beautiful tonight. Full of stars. _Like his eyes._  
_Maybe we could stay just friends. Perhaps I could pick up the phone, or call him even, and-_  
_Who am I trying to fool? We never could stay just friends, no matter how hard we tried. If only things were different..._

"Again?"  
I heard Lola saying, as she got in the kitchen and took a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Yeah.", I exhaled, turning to face her, a small smile on my face.

"I think you should book an appointment with your doctor, Em. Don't be stubborn.", she opened the bottle and started drinking from it.

"Nah, I'm fine."

"Em!-"

"Okay okay, I will!", I said lifting my hand in the air, defending myself, and we both laughed. "As soon as I'll return."

  We both sat on the table and I drank the painkillers.

"Did he call again?", she asked in a low voice after some seconds.

"I knew that you will ask me.", I said and turned my gaze to the dark sky.

"You know me.", she said and leaned her back on the chair with a smile on her lips. "Well?"

"No. Not again for today." I cleared my throat and looked and my hands that were on the table, starting to play with my fingers.

"How many times does he has to call to get your response?"

"It's not that easy, okay?", I said in a low voice, still avoiding to look at my friend.

"Em.", she placed her hand on mine, trying to make me stop playing with my fingers. "At least do not take from him what he always had. Your friendship is so strong, Emilia." A serious tone in her voice.

"Is it?", I whispered, looking at her in the eyes. Tears started filling my eyes and threatening to fall once again. I turned my gaze to the sky.

"Of course it is! Hey, look at me.", she said to me, squeezing my hand.  
I looked at my friend and noticed her warm smile, lighting up her beautiful eyes.  
"My little baby is in love.", she said as she put my hair behind my ear.

"Is it that obvious?", my gaze fell on the table.  
  She left a small breath and smiled to me one more time.  
  
  
  


**•+++•**

 

_Kit_   
  
  


_I quit._ No matter how many times I tried to sleep, I couldn't.  
I left my bed and went straight to the window.  
  _Not one cloud in the dark sky. Thousands of stars decorating it gracefully. Just like she loves it. I miss her._  
  I looked at the clock on the wall. _02:32'am._ I always had that problem. It was difficult for me to sleep at nights. Every time. Except when she's with me. Then I'm just trying to stay awake, just to look at her.  
_Stop. Go back to bed._  
  


* **buzz buzz***  
  


  My heart skipped a beat on the sound of my phone on the night stand. I turned my body and saw the lighted screen of my phone, now becoming dark again. I approached the night stand and took the mobile in my hands.  
  


  _Sorry for not answering your calls. I was not feeling so well._  
  


  A big smile appeared on my face. _Oh, Milly._ Suddenly, I couldn't think of anything. _She text me._ _And now I'm smiling like an idiot. Great. God, I've missed her._ I started tapping.  
  


_K: It's okay._  
_How are you?_  
  


  I sat on the bed and placed my phone next to me. Within some minutes, it rang again.  
  


_E: I'm better now, thank you._  
_And you?_  
  


_K: Good. I returned to London._   
  


  _But probably she already know that. My photos are all over the internet._  
  


_E: Oh. And I'm still on my holidays. Poor you._   
  


  I laughed at that. She never waste time to roast me.  
  


_K: Well, you don't have to rub that on my face. XD_   
  


_E: I apologise then._   
  


  I was looking at her last message for some minutes, not knowing what to say, and my fingers started moving automatically.  
  


_K: I've missed you._   
  


_I said it. She's not answering. Great, Kit. Great._   
  


***buzz buzz***   
  


_E: I've missed you, too._   
  


  _She misses me._  
_Let's change the subject. I'm sure she's feeling uncomfortable._  
  


_K: What are you doing awake? I suppose it's late there._   
  


_E: It is. Let's say that it's not one of my days._   
  


A second message popped up.  
  


_E: And you? Again?_   
  


_How well you know me..._   
  


_K: Again._   
  
  


**•+++•**   
  


  
_Emilia_

_Italy, end of August_   
  
  


"Are you sure?", Lola said though the phone.

"No. I don't know.", I answered, nervously.

"Emilia. This is serious!"

"I know!" I curled up in the duvet and squeezed my knees on my chest, trying to not burst into tears.

"So?!"

It felt like centuries until the words came out of my mouth.  
"I'm late."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope that you liked it as much as I did! Leave your thoughts on the comments, it'll mean a lot. I'd love to read them and answer all your questions! Love you all, see you soon! xx <3


	13. ~Alone~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! The next chapter is here again! It took me less than I thought XD Although I can't say that it's a good chapter as I hadn't the proper time to write. Anyway! Remember that every story becomes better with music, so put your playlist on and enjoy! Don't forget to leave a comment about your thoughts, you are the greatest motivation for a writer. Enjoy! <3

* * *

 

_ Los Angeles, September _

 

 

  The clock on the grey wall is ticking, yet time's not flying. He told me to wait here until he'll come back in any minute.  
  I preferred to come here, in LA, rather than London. Privacy is higher here, as it is a really big city.

"So, Mrs. Clarke.", he said entering his office. "I have the results of your last week's exams in my hands. Are you ready?"

"Yes, please."

"Well...", he sat on his office chair and opened the file he was holding moments now. "Oh."

"What is it? Is it...", my words stuck in my throat.

"Unfortunately, Mrs. Clarke. It's negative."

  I closed my eyes and I felt relief. I took a deep breath and opened them again, looking at the doctor. "No. It's fine."

"Are you- are you sure? I mean, a pregnancy is a great thing for a woman.", he said, confused to see my reaction to the news.

"Yes, I am."

"Okay then. I suppose the results are what you expected.", he smiled to me and stretched out his hand on an attempt to shake mine. "I guess we're done here. It was a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Clarke."

  Mirroring his gesture, I also stretched out my hand and shook his own.  
"It was a pleasure for me too, doctor. Thank you." I stood up and walked to the door. "Have a nice day." And with that I left the office.

  _Rainy. Good. Okay, I'll get in my car and drive back home. Everything is gonna be alright._  
_Fortunately..._  
_To be honest, I was starting to get used to that idea. Having a baby.... Nah. It's better this way. I guess..._

  As I was walking down the street, my phone started ringing. I pulled it out of my bag and pressed the green button.

"Hello?"

" _Hey. It's me. Just arrived at the house._ ", Lola said from the other side.

"Oh, great. How was you walk?"

" _Fine, but that's not the point. So?!_ "

"No.", told her, nervously, looking at my feet, in a low voice.

" _What do you mean 'no'?_ "

"I'm not.", I whispered.

Some seconds passed before I get her response.  
" _Oh._ "

"Yeah..."

" _Are you okay?_ "

"Yeah. Never been better...", I said looking at my hand that I placed on my stomach without thinking and I pulled it back immediately.

" _Okay... Em?_ "

"Yes?"

" _Will you be okay on Monday? I mean- You know what I mean._ "

"Absolutely. Don't worry. Besides, you will be with me, remember? I'll be okay."

" _Okay then... Well, hurry up, I'm cooking for ya!_ "

"You spoil me! I'm on my way." I smiled.

" _Great, I'm waiting. Bye!_ "

"Bye!"  
I hung up the phone and started walking to my car.  
  _No. Monday will be fine. I mean, we will have fun and we will laugh, and dance, and maybe we will get some awards, and... it'll be just fine._  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**  


 

 

  
_Finally, home. I feel so tired._  
I pulled out my keys and opened the door. As I was placing my jacket on the chair, I heard some footsteps, coming to my direction. I lifted my head and saw Lola, smiling at me.  
"Hi.", she said.

"Hi.", I responded, smiling back sadly.

  She then approached me and took me in for a hug and I closed my eyes, hugging her back.

"Are you okay?", she whispered, caressing my head, still in our embrace.

"Yes. I guess."

"Come. Food is ready." She freed me from her arms and led me to the kitchen.

 

 

"Wow! Damn, this smells really good!"

"Yeap! Wait until you eat it.", she winked at me and we both laughed.  
  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**  


 

 

  
"Ugh, I'm full. Lord, you're really spoiling me.", I said lying on my couch.

"Somebody has to teach you how to eat, Mrs. Clarke.", she laughed and sat next to me.

"Please, don't call me that. I heard it so many times from the doctor today.", I told her, my eyes closed.

"Oh yeah, about that...", she started.

"Oh my god-"

"Come on, Milly. You didn't say a single word from the moment you arrived.", she complained, looking at me and I opened my eyes.

"Okay...", I said, lifting my body in a sitting position.  
"Well... he was surprised by my reaction."

"What do you mean?" She pulled a pillow on her legs and hugged it, her full attention to me.

"You know... I was relieved. I'm totally okay with that. It was just a false alarm." I position myself on the fluffy pillows of my couch, and looked at the pool out, through the large glass door.

"Are you?", she asked me, dragging my attention back to her.

"What?"

"Are you really okay with that?", she asked again.

"Of course.", I said clearing my throat.

"Em.", she met my gaze. "You won't fool me. You lowkey wanted it, didn't you?"

I took a deep breath.  
"Pfft. Maybe... I mean- I'm watching my godson, this beautiful little beast, laughing, and growing, and... you know." I looked at my hands.

"Aww. Baby, I'm so sorry.", she whispered, reaching and holding my hand.

"It's okay. Never happened, right?", I shook my shoulders and smiled sadly at my best friend, as I felt tears gathering in my eyes.

"I'm always here for you." She hugged me once again.

"I know. I know...", I whispered on her hair, closing my eyes.  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

 

_ Emmy Awards, September 17th _

  The doors of our car opened and a hand stretched out to help me to get out. Instantly, flashes and voices flooded the environment. I could hear my name everywhere. On my left, on my right, behind and in front of me. I showed them my biggest smile and waited for Lola to come by my side, so that we can walk down the beautiful golden carpet together.

"Go on. I'm right behind you.", she said when I looked at her.

  I started walking and smiling at all of them, as photographers were shooting my name. Some of them wanted to interview me, but I refused. It's really not the right time to do this.

"Where the hell were you?", I asked Lola as soon as we both got in the building.

"I told you! I was right behind you.", she said laughing while we were walking in.

  There were so many people in there. All in suits and gowns. I'm so happy to attend such an amazing event. Great actors and talents people everywhere. Every time it's a surprise. _And I'm here too!_  
  Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder and I froze. I turned my body and saw two big familiar smiles.

"Emilia!", Nathalie said, hugging me. "Oh hi Lola!"

"Oh my god! Hi, you gorgeous!" I returned the big smile as we separated.

"Hi, guys!", Lola said.

"Your Grace." Jacob bowed in front of me.

"Hello! How are you guys? It's been so long.", I asked them both.

"Good! You know, walking around the place.", Jacob said smiling.

"We're fine, excited to be here! And what about you, gurl? You owe me some explanations as I remember. I'm sure you have news too.", she smirked at me.

"Actually...", I shook my head.

"Oh! Okay.", she frowned and cleared her throat.

"So, is anybody else from the crew here yet or we came early?", I tried to change the subject.

"Yeah! Nikolaj is here with his wife. Oh! And Kit came. To be honest, I saw him moment ago."

  My stomach became a knot on the sound of Jacob's words.  
"Really? Is he somewhere around here?", I asked him as my eyes were travelling all over the place.

"Well he...", he started saying but his words faded and a smile appeared on his face.

  A hand touched my waist. That touch was so familiar that made me shiver. I arched my back. _I don't want to turn my head._

"Hello.", he said.  
_How much I missed that voice..._

  I turned my body and saw him. His warm brown eyes looking straight in mine. No one where around. Not anymore.

"How are you, Kit?", Lola said dragging both of our attention back.  
  She came closer and hugged him, giving me _the_ look. I moved backwards and cleared my throat.

"I'm fine, thanks.", he responded, smiling. His eyes met mine once again.

"What do you think of going inside, guys? I think it's time.", Nathalie said, always saving me.

"Yeah, really good idea.", Lola agreed and held my arm.

  We walked in. A lovely woman came to show us our seats.  
"Hello! So...", she opened the file she was holding. "Mr. Anderson. You're in the D section, with Mrs. Emmanuel. My colleague will lead you in your seats.", she smiled at them.

"Thank you. See you on the stage guys.", Jacob said and then they left.

"Okay, and... Mr. Harington, you're in the C section, right in front of Mr. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau. And you Mrs. Clarke... Oh yes. You are in the B section.", she lifted her gaze from the papers and smiled at us.

"Wait- Why aren't we sitting next to each other? I mean, the cast.", Kit said, pretending to be cool, but I know him too well.

"Well- I'm not in the position to answer you that, Mr. Harington. I guess the rules are this way."

"Oh, okay. Of course.", he said nervously.

  The woman smiled and then looked at me. "Mrs. Clarke, please follow my colleagues. They'll show you your seats."

  I smiled back and did what she asked me to. As we were walking to our seats, I turned my head and saw him speaking to the woman and then looking at me again. I immediately turned my gaze and kept walking.

"Oh my god! Aren't you excited?!", Lola asked me, as soon as we took our seats.

"Yeah, of course.", I replied, looking around.

"You don't convince me though.", she said and looked at me suspiciously.

"Shut up." I laughed and hit her gently on her arm, causing her to laugh too.

"Shhh, it's starting!", Lola whispered to me.

  Everyone was applauding. _So it is starting. And he is here too... Wait. Alone?_  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

 

"The Emmy for the best writing for a Comedy series goes to," Millie Bobby Brown announced on the microphone. _Such a lovely girl._ I looked at the card and saw the name too. "Amy Sherman-Palladino!"

  I smiled at the crown, who was applauding, waiting for the winner to come up to the stage.

"Congratulations!", I said shaking the winner's hand.

"Thank you!", she said smiling at me and then turned to face the audience.  
  As she started speaking to the microphone, we took some steps backwards to give her space for her speech.

"I really feel honoured to present with you, Emilia. I love your work.", Millie told me.

"Aww, thank you so much. That's really nice of you! You're also doing amazing, young lady.", I said to her, causing her to smile, and then we both turned our gazes at the applauding audience, as Mrs. Sherman-Palladino was walking down of the stage. We followed her and headed to our seats.

"Umm, excuse me, Mrs. Clarke?"

  A man stopped my attempt to walk to my seat. I turned around and saw Lola too, standing in front of me and smiling.

"Yes?"

"Your seats has changed. You're sitting on the C section, right next to Mr. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, and his wife."

"Oh! Okay...", I said to him and looked at Lola suspiciously. She shook my head and mirrored my gaze.

"Follow me please."

  As the ceremony goes on, we were approaching the C section when Nikolaj spotted me.

"Emilia! What a surprise!" He stood up to give a hug, such as his wife.

  My eye caught his figure. On the sound of my name, he froze.

"Hi! How are you?!"

"Great, dear!", his wife, Nukâka, answered to me, as she motioned to me and Lola to take the two free seats on her left side. "Come on!"

  We walked in the row and then took the seats.

"I told them, we all have to sit together.", Kit said and then looked at us from the front seat.

"You did it, didn't you?", I told him, smiling.

"Maybe I did.", he shook his shoulders and smiled back at me.

"Hmm... And where is Nath and Jacob then?" A smirk appeared on my face.

"Well, there were only two free seats here.", he said smiling and turned again in front, looking at the stage.

"Sucker.", I murmured, refusing to let my smile go off my face.

  Suddenly, everyone around us started applauding and standing up.  
"What's happening?", I whispered to Lola's ear.

"I don't know, something is happening on the stage.", she replied.  
  We mirrored their actions and stood up too.

  On the stage, was the winner of the Emmy of directing for Variety Special, Mr. Glenn Weiss.

"I didn't ask yet. I didn't ask yet.", he said on the microphone, smiling so damn bright.

  I saw his partner, Jan Svendsen, walking towards him. She was literally shaking, led by some people to the stage. Her smile as bright as his.

"Oh my god, what's happening?", I said to Lola, embracing my arms to her own.

"He's gonna propose to her!", she replied to me happily.

"This is the ring that my dad put on my mum's finger sixty-five-- sixty-seven years ago,", he turned his gaze to the audience with the ring on his fingertips, "and to my sisters and brothers, I didn't swipe it, dad knows I have it, okay?" We all laughed to that.  
"Jan, I want to put this ring, that my mum wore, on your finger, and in front of all these people and in front of my mum and your parents watching, from above, will you marry me?" He then put the ring on her finger and, kneeling in front of her, he waited for her answer.

"Oh my god!", I said jumping.  
Without thinking any longer, I stretched out my hand and pulled Kit backwards by his shoulder. "Kit! You see?!"

"Yeah!", he answered, without turning his eyes to meet mine.

  Jan bent over and took her now fiancé's face on her both hands.  
"I love you.", she said kissing him.

  The whole audience started cheering and clapping on the sight of the couple.  
"Wow!", I screamed, clapping.

"Thank you to the Academy! Thank you everybody!", Mr. Weiss said. He then grabbed his fiancé's hand and together they walked out of the stage.

"Aww, that was really sweet!", I admitted to my mates.  
  I took my seat and looked in front. My eyes met two brown ones, looking straight back at me. I panicked.  
  I cleared my throat and then- we both smiled.

"What?", I asked him.

"Nothing.", he said and returned in front after some seconds.

 _Kitten..._  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**  


 

 

  
"It's time, it's time!", Lola said from my side.

"Alright. We've got one more award to go.", the presenter said to the microphone. "The Emmy, for Outstanding Drama Series, goes to,"

"It's happening!", I heard my friends saying.

"Game of Thrones!"

  The intro music of our show flooded the room, everyone around was clapping. All the cameras were on us.  
We stood up to walk to the stage where our award was.

"Emilia, wait.", Kit said to me the moment I stepped out of my row.

"What?", I told him, wrapping my arm on him, smiling.

"We need to talk later.", he whispered to my ear, as I leaned forward. He touched and held my hand.

"Sure.", I replied, not knowing what to say, as we were already standing in of the stage's stairs.  
  I took my hands off him and started climbing the stairs.

"Heyy! Congrats!", I hugged Gwendolyn, Nathalie, Isaac and Jacob, and stood with them on the back, as David and Dan took their place in front of the microphone.

  David started speaking.  
"Well, writing for these actors behind us is the honor of a lifetime but we didn't invent these characters, that was George RR Martin, we could not have-- the show could not be without the mad genius of George. Thank you for letting us take care of your people. Umm HBO, there's no better place to work, thank you Richard Plepler, you said yes to us ten years ago and that's the only reason we're standing up here now. Thank you to everyone else at HBO and umm...", he turned to Dan, "Go."

"And, it's a show as only as good as the people who make it and we are blessed and lucky to have the greatest cast, the greatest crew", he looked at all of us, "led by the greatest team of producers, led by the indomitable Bernie Caulfield", he said as she came in front, "this is the woman who actually makes the show, the rest of us order lunch.", he admitted causing us to laugh, "Umm, and it's an honour to work with them from Spain to Iceland, all the way to our home base of Belfast, Northern Ireland, here's to you Belfast, it's been an honour."

"Amanda Peet, I love you so much, Frankie Molly and Henry, I love you all.", David said.

"Andrea, Leo, Hugo, I love you very much.", Dan said too.

"We love all of you guys.", David said again at the end, turning to all of us with his hands open to us for a hug.

"Aww!"  
"Yeah!"  
"Good job, guys!"  
  Everyone was hugging each other and shaking hands, and we all knew just then that the night had just started.  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

 

"One more question on the look-back left.", the journalist said. "Thank you very much. Umm, this question is for both Emilia and for Kit if you could both step to the mic please."

  I froze. I cleared my throat and stepped forward, as everybody was looking at us.  
"Wooow.", they all did in one voice.

"Since you avoided us on the carpet.", the journalist mentioned and then cleared his throat. "And I'm sorry, I'm not from Australia, Israel, or China, I'm just from Los Angeles, so bear with me here."

"Oh, you're forgiven.", I told him ironically.

"Umm, quick question. How has life changed for both of you because of this project? I mean, what really has happen in your lives because of this?"

  I laughed, looking at Kit. I lifted my hand and motioned to him, and he stepped forward on the microphone to speak first.

"Well I mean-"

"Step to the mic please.", the journalist interrupted him.

"Yeah, okay. Sorry.", he started again. His hands were buried in his pockets. _He's always doing that when he's nervous._  
"Umm... I- met my wife, in this show, so in that way it gave me my, hopefully, future family, and- and my life from here and on. That's the main thing it did for me, and then it given, you know, it changed it completely, the last ten years you could not ask for a better job to have in you twenties. To take you through your twenties than to be an actor in Game of Thrones, it's been the most amazing thing so it changed it completely, obviously.", he took two steps backwards, giving me his previous spot.

"Thank you, Kit. Umm, Emilia.", the journalist said, so I stepped in front.

"Ahm yeah, really similar, apart from the wife thing, basically.", I said making everyone laugh. "Umm. Yeah, it- it's given me my entire career, and it's given me my entire life, as I know it now, so it's kind of- I genuinely owe it absolutely everything, and it changed everything, so I'm incredibly lucky.", I finished with a smile.

"Congratulations. Thank you."

"Thank you.", I said and turned to take my previous place.

"Thank you very much.", the journalist said one more time, as we all were walking down the platform, to the back room.

  As I was adjusting my dress and everybody was walking in front of me, I caught him with my eye. He didn't even turn to look at my direction. _Not that he had to anyway._  
_Jesus. You heard him. He met his wife in the show. He wants a future family with his wife. What do you want? To ruin it? Make up your mind, Emilia. And imagine if that was true. If I was indeed pregnant. That would be a disaster. A small, sweet, beautiful disaster of mine... But I'm glad. I really am. I-_  
  


 

**•+++•**

 

"Try that one, too.", Lola said to me, holding a glass of some orange liquid.

"What is that now?", I said, taking a sip. "Oh! It's sweet."

"I've no idea, I just grabbed it from the table. Isn't it good?", she told me excitedly.

"Yeah!", I took another sip.

"I'll be back in a minute. I'll go to get us some more.", she then turned her back to me and walked to the bar.

"Emilia.", he said, placing his hand on my waist. I nearly jumped.

"Kit." I turned around to face him.

"How are you?", he asked me looking at his shoes and then at me.

"I've been better.", I smiled. "But I'm okay. What about you?"

"Fine. Thank you."

"I'm glad to hear."  
  The silence became awkward as time was flying. I looked at my dress, adjusting it. _Where's Lola?!_

"Em.", he said, dragging my attention back and coming even closer. "We need to talk."

"I don't think that we have to-"

"We have to.", he interrupted me. "Please."

  I was standing there, in front of him, our eyes locked. _What does he want now? Didn't we suffer enough?_

"Umm... excuse me."  
  We both took a step back and looked at the man who was standing beside us, with a camera on his hands.  
"May I?", he said, lifting his camera a little bit.

"Sure.", I said, turning my body to him.

"Mr. Harington, come a little closer please.", the photographer asked Kit.

  He looked at me, asking for my permission, and then he approached slowly. His hand surrounded my waist and he pulled me closer to his chest. I ran my hand on his back and rested it on his shoulder.  
  And suddenly his grip on my waist became tighter, taking my breath away. At that moment, I looked at him and fortunately the photographer had already lowered the camera to check what he did.

"Okay, thank you very much. Enjoy your night.", he smiled at us and then he left.

  I instantly got out of his embrace and forced myself to calm.

"Listen-"

"Heyy! Are you partying without me? How dare you.", Lola came and interrupted him, with a smile on her lips, always at the right time.

"No, we were just...", he turned his gaze to me, "talking.", he said putting his hands on his pockets.  
"Anyway, maybe we could do this later." He looked at the both of us and smiled. "Enjoy the party.", and with that he left us.

"Is everything alright?", Lola asked me.

"Yeah. I think so...", I replied to her, looking at the direction he walked moments ago.  
  


 

 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

 

  Time passed so quickly that we didn't even notice. We danced, and sang, and drank, way more than we actually should. Many of the people who attended tonight were already gone. And now it's our moment to go. We walked outside and waited for our car.

" _Brr._ ", I felt shiver down my spin and touched my bare arms, hugging myself. "It's a little cold out here, isn't it?", I mentioned to Lola with a smile and knit eyebrows.

"You're cold for real?!", he told me, laughing. "Emilia, genuinely it's not."

"Yeah, okay. You're only talking cause you have sleeves.", I complained and looked at the road.

"Emilia.", Lola whispered to me.

"What?"

"He's coming.", she said in a low voice, so that only I could hear and looked over my shoulder, smiling.  
"Don't tell me you're leaving too. I can't believe it.", she said boldly.

"Yeah, I am.", he smiled. "Actually, I came to say goodnight."

  I finally turned around to face him. I looked at him and the only thing I was able to do is to smile. No words pop up on my head. He met my gaze.

"There was something that I wanted to talk about with you, but I guess it's quite late now for that, right?" I just looked at him.  
"So...", he came closer. "Friends?", he lifted his hand for a shake.

 _Wha-_  
I felt an invisible break inside of my chest, already regretting all the kind of alcohol I had drank this night.

"Of course.", I took his hand in mine and shook it. "Always.", I said swallowing uneasy, my eyes looking straight in his.  
  Seconds became a little more than they should and I finally tried to free my hand. His eyes didn't leave mine and he held my hand even tighter.

"Goodnight.", he whispered and let go of my hand as Lola opened the door for me, of the car that I didn't even notice it had been arrived.  
  He looked at me one more time and I noticed that his lips parted as if there was something else that he wanted to say, but then he took two steps back and left.  
  I got in the back seat, with Lola next to me, who had already got in previously.

"What was that?", she asked me curiously, her voice almost a whisper.

"I- I've no idea.", I responded to her, looking in front with raised eyebrows.

"You didn't do something that has to do with that, did you?"

"No. Of course not." _Did I?..._

"Okay, just saying...", she said, turning her eyes on the window.

  _That was it. This night seemed like an eternity. Finally it came to an end._  
_He had something to tell me. And I didn't let him do it. What would that be? Not something that brings happiness I assume. And that is exactly what I don't need right now in my life._  
_The previous weeks were literally like hell for me. Even more the last one... for many reasons. I need to focus on something else._  
_Besides, he said it on his own, 'friends'. Maybe that was what he wanted to tell me... So he also want to focus on something else. Perhaps creating his future family like he mentioned. We will always be friends. Right-?_  
  
  
  


* * *

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Leave your thoughts on the comments, it'll mean a lot. I'd love to read them and answer all your questions! I just wanted to mention that, for me, everyone and everything deserves a happy ending... xx <3


	14. ~It's not too late~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyy you all! The next chapter is finally here! Thoughts remains in the minds, words hugging on the tips of the lips. But, for how long will they be in that way?  
>  Remember what I'm always saying lol, that every story becomes better with music, so put your playlist on and enjoy! Don't forget to leave a comment about your thoughts, you are the greatest motivation for a writer.  
> Enjoy! <3

* * *

  
  


_Kit_   
  


Second half of October, 2018   
  
  
  


  My phone is ringing. I can hear it from here.  
  Days passed cruelly slow, without the answer I was waiting for, for too damn long. Almost two months. _Why the fock does it takes so long? I can't understand, all must have been done until now._  
  I left my phone on the table of my living room as soon as I arrived at my house, an hour ago, at _9p.m_. I preferred to waste my time laying down on my bed, rather than waiting for that bloody call. _I'm calling him everyday. Every focking day. And still the answer is the same as before. "Not yet"._  
  _I can't wait for the day I'll do what I'm thinking all this time. I can feel it, it's near._  
  It is ringing again.  
_I have to pick it up._ _I just- I'm not feeling so chatty today. Not that I ever was._  
  ' _I don't think that we have to.'_ _That was what she said to me that night. I was planning to tell her about what I've done, back in Japan. That it'll be officially over soon. But, at the last minute, I decided not to try again. Not so early. I don't have a clear answer, not even now, one month later. She wouldn't believe me once again._

"Jesus.", I said, getting up from the bed.  
  I walked to the living room and took the phone on my hand.  
"Finally!", I shouted and then pressed the green button.

"I hope you have good news.", I told him.

"We did it, Kit. It's over.", he replied to me, and the smile had already appeared on my face.

"What?", I said, scratching my bread. "Are you- are you sure?"

"Yes. She signed. It's over, Kit."

  I chuckled, burying my fingertips in my hair on the back of my neck.  
"I can't believe it.", I whispered. _Finally. I'm free to do whatever I want to. I have to tell her. Yeah, that's what I'm gonna to right focking now, I will-_

"But, there's something else, Kit.", my lawyer said to me, interrupting my thoughts.

"What is it?", I said, hesitantly.

"You have to refer to her name. At least to the half of the interviews you will do from the next year.", he paused. "It's the deal, Kit."

"What? Is she kidding me?!", I started walking in my living room. I stopped in front of the window. "The interview at the Emmys was not enough, was it?"

"Unfortunately, Kit. It was the best we could do.", he replied.

  I exhaled heavily and pressed the bridge of my nose as I closed my eyes.  
"Okay, got it.", I responded after some seconds. "I'll try to do it. But, just to know that I won't do this every time. It's ridiculous-"

"Gotcha! We talked about this. At least at the half of them. Can I count on you?", he interrupted me once again.

"Yeah, of course." I turned my head and looked at the clock on the wall. _22:18'_. _I have to go there. She must be there at this time. Maybe she's sleeping. But I can not wait any longer._  
"Hey, I gotta go now. I- I have to go somewhere and I'm really late. Thank you again, we will speak again soon for the other stuff. We have to discuss about, you know, the relationship status that should be published."

"I completely understand. Don't worry, I'll speak with her lawyer and make a plan. I'll inform you soon. Have a good night, Kit."

"Yeah, thank you. Goodnight.", I told him and then I hung up the phone call.  
  I nearly ran to my bedroom, changed my jumper and went straight to my front door and put my shoes on. I grabbed my phone and my jacket, and got out of my house, heading to my car. _It's not too late...It's not too late..._  
  
  
  
  
  


**•+++•**

  
  
  
  
  


  It's been a long time since I came here for the last time. _This house is really huge. Every time she was telling me that it literally is bigger than she need, especially for a person in her size. But then I was reminding her that the size it's perfect. 'As big as your heart.' That was my answer. And she was laughing. Every time._  
  I just got out of my car, and suddenly, I lost my ability of walking. _What if she does not want to talk with me? Or even to see me? Will she listen to what I have to say to her? I need to clear the situation. She never had anything to this. She's too kind to understand some things. To recognise the truth from that bunch of lies._

I'm out of the door. I attempted to lift my hand to knock the door. Yeah, _I just have to raise my hand and-_

  Suddenly, the door opened, and there she was. Her beautiful eyes as wide as mine. I started panicking. She opened her mouth to speak but then she regretted it, swallowing uneasy.

"Hi-", I started saying, when some sounds inside of the house stopped me. _She's not alone. Of course she's not, you idiot. Shit-_

"Kit.", she said with open wide eyes, clearing her throat.  
  She then came out, closing a bit the door behind her, letting a little space open.  
"What- what are you doing here?", she asked me, now in a lower voice. She wrapped her robe even tighter on her small body and hugged herself because of the cold that this night has.

"I- I guess I came on a wrong time. I'm sorry.", I looked at her in the eyes and then turned to leave. _She's not alone, Kit. You have to go._

  The sudden sound of the door stopped me and automatically I turned my gaze again to her.  
  A small fluffy cloud then came out of the house and its happy tail started wiggling as soon as it noticed me.

"Oh my god, look at that little bear.", I said kneeling down on the grass to pet her, as she came straight to my direction.  
"You're bigger than I last saw you, aren't you?", I said to the dog, smiling.

"And older.", Emilia said, leaning on the wall and mirroring my smile.

  I looked at her again, petting the dog. _I missed her smile. I focking missed it so much._

"Oh! Hi, Kit!", Bennett, Emilia's brother came out of the house too, surprised by my existence.

"Hello, Bennett! How are you?", I stood up and shook his hand.

"Everything is fine. I came to get Roxy. She missed my sister's company as it seems.", he smiled and bent down to scratch Roxy's back.

"Oh, I see.", I replied.

"Yeap.", he said, standing up again. "Anyway. We gotta go now." He turned to his sister. "I'll call you tomorrow." He hugged her and turned to me, smiling. "Nice to see you again, Kit."

"Likewise.", I said, shaking his hand.

  Emilia's brother walked to his car with Roxy and after some minutes, they were gone.  
  I put my palms in my pockets nervously and looked again at her. It seemed like centuries until she finally spoke.

"So.", she placed her hand on the door. "Are you coming in or what?"

  Her words surprised me. I didn't know how to reply to her.

"Look, I'm not that cruel to let you freeze out here that time of the night.", she added.

"Yes, of course." I cleared my throat and walked inside the house.

"Well,", she continued as I sat on the couch. "Do you wanna drink anything?"

"No, I'm fine. Thank you.", I responded, trying to find the words I wanted so much to say.  
"Please have a seat.", I told her.

  She sat on the other couch next to mine, obviously to me that she doesn't want to be near me. _Why should she?..._

"You didn't answer though.", she said, looking everywhere but me. "Why did you come here?"

"I needed to speak with you about something. The same thing that I wanted to tell you a month ago." She looked at me.  
"You said that it was not the right time. And I respected that. But it is now.", I continued, already noticing the feelings in her eyes as she's now looking straight at mine.  
"I know that maybe it doesn't matter now. Or maybe it just does not matter to you anymore. But it does to me. More that you can imagine." I approached her, moving a seat on the couch I was sitting.

"Kit, don't-", she started speaking, turning her eyes on the ground.

"No. You will listen to me this time.", I interrupted her. I looked at her golden-blue eyes. "It's over.", I said calmly.

"What do you mean?", she said after some seconds.

"My lawyer called me a couple of hours ago. About the divorce." I swallowed uneasy, waiting for her answer.

  Her face became serious and suddenly, angry tears were threatening to fall from her eyes, as she was looking at somewhere in front of her. "You hurt her?", she said, not even looking at me.

"No! Milly, look at me.", I stood up from the couch and then kneeled in front of her, taking her little hands in both of mine. So cold...  
"I didn't hurt her. She never had feeling for me. I told you before, we did that on purpose." She looked at me.

"How can you be so sure?"  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**•+++•**

  
  
  
  
  
  


_Emilia_

  
  


"Oh! The door.", I said while I was scratching Roxy's ears. I stood up and started walking.

"Emilia, we have to go in a bit, just to know.", my brother told me for the living room.  
  _I so much wanted to see that teddy bear, and of course my brother before_ _I_ _go. I missed them so much._  
  I stopped to wear my blue robe and then I opened the door.  
  I didn't expect to see him here, right now. Not at all to be honest. _Kitten..._  
  I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out of it. I immediately noticed his panic. _Why is he here? Why now?_

"Hi-", he finally started to speak, but he stopped. I heard footsteps inside of my house and I realized that my brother and Roxy were already on their way out.

"Kit.", I said, surprisingly. I pulled the door behind me, a sign to my brother that he better not come out yet.  
"What- what are you doing here?", I whispered, so only he can hear me. I wrapped the robe even tighter on my body. _Lord, it's so cold out here._  
  I heard sounds from the inside again. _Shit-_

"I- I guess I came on a wrong time. I'm sorry." He looked at me and then turned to leave. _Where is he going now?-_

  Suddenly, Roxy came out of the house and ran straight to him. I then saw him kneeling in front of the dog and started petting her.

"Oh my god, look at that little bear.", he said. "You're bigger than I last saw you, aren't you?"

"And older.", I added, leaning on the wall. He then looked at me, and I saw it. His beautiful smile. _How much have I missed that smile..._

"Oh! Hi, Kit!", my brother came out too. Every time at the wrong time.

"Hello, Bennett! How are you?", Kit stood up and shook my brother's hand.

"Everything is fine. I came to get Roxy. She missed my sister's company as it seems.", he smiled and bent down to scratch Roxy's back.

"Oh, I see.", Kit replied to him.

"Yeap.", he said back, standing up again. "Anyway. We gotta go now." He turned to me. "I'll call you tomorrow." He hugged me and turned to him again, smiling. "Nice to see you again, Kit."

"Likewise.", he said, shaking my brother's hand.

  My brother took Roxy and walked to his car. After some minutes, only the two of us were in the house.  
  He was looking at the car, having his back to my direction. _He's nervous._ He turned his body to me and looked me in the eyes.

"So.", I finally decided to speak first. I touched the door, publishing it a little bit to open. "Are you coming in or what?", I added, obviously surprising him.  
"Look, I'm not that cruel to let you freeze out here that time of the night."

"Yes, of course." He cleared his throat and walked inside the house.

  I was watching him walking inside the house, looking around the room. I closed the door behind me and he finally sat on the couch.

"Well, do you wanna drink anything?", I asked him, giving an end to the silence.

"No, I'm fine. Thank you.", he responded.  
"Please have a seat.", he told me.

  I hesitantly sat on the other couch next to his. I better not sit next to him.  
"You didn't answer though.", I said, trying not to meet his gaze. "Why did you come here?", I asked him straight.

"I needed to speak with you about something. The same thing that I wanted to tell you a month ago." That made me look at him instantly. _Not again Kitten-_  
"You said that it was not the right time. And I respected that. But it is now.", he continued.  
"I know that maybe it doesn't matter now. Or maybe it just does not matter to you anymore. But it does to me. More that you can imagine." He approached me dangerously, moving a seat on the couch he was sitting.

"Kit, don't-", I started speaking, turning my eyes on the ground.

"No. You will listen to me this time.", he interrupted me. He looked at me. "It's over.", he said now in a lower voice.

  _Wha- What does that mean now? What is he trying to do again?_  
"What do you mean?", I said after some seconds, my panic starting to build up.

"My lawyer called me a couple of hours ago. About the divorce." He swallowed uneasy and then stopped.

  I felt my own blood running hot in my veins, as tears started gathering in my eyes. Thoughts flooded my head. _How did he do that to her?_  
"You hurt her?", I asked him, without taking my gaze away from the floor.

"No!" I felt him moving. "Milly, look at me." He kneeled in front of me and suddenly took my hands in both of his.  
"I didn't hurt her. She never had feeling for me. I told you before, we did that on purpose." I looked at him.

"How can you be so sure?"

"Cause she said that to me.", he replied. I said nothing. I dropped my gaze to my hands, feeling the warmth that his palms were giving to my cold flesh.

"Emilia.", he whispered. "Don't do this. You know how I feel." He took one of his hands off mine and lifted it to cup the side of my face. "Please.", he whispered.

  My wet eyes met his. He started caressing my cheek bone, wiping a single tear that fell off at the same time.  
"Even if that's true", I started, sniffing, "how possible do you think that this is for us? How can that work, Kit?", I said, knowing that the possibilities are not so many.

"Believe me, it can work.", he said moving to sit next to me.

"You know we're fooling ourselves if we believe that, Kit.", I said and stood up, as soon as he sat down, so that he can not see the fresh wave of tears that came to my eyes. I adjusted my robe and hugged myself, having my back to him. "They soon will drop the news. I can not appear as your partner, Kit.", I continued.

"It doesn't has to be this way.", he said.

"And then what?", I turned to look at him. "Kit, it's me who will be the home-wrecker anyway. You know they will write about it too."

"I won't let that happen.", he told me, standing up. He approached me and cupped my face with both of his hands. "Do you hear me? I will not.", he whispered, looking at my eyes.

  I fisted my hands and placed them on his chest. Feeling the tears on my cheeks, I quickly buried my face between my fists on his chest, not wanting him to see it.  
  He put his arms around my body slowly, inviting me in a hug that I so much needed. He hugged me tight, none of us wanted to speak, or even to move. _God. I've missed that. The familiar scent of his clothes. Of his body. I've missed his touch._  
_But dreams don't last, do they?_

"You must go.", I whispered to his neck, already regretting my words.

"What?", he asked, confused, now looking at me.

  I escaped from his arms and walked to the door, trying to keep my tears back. I touched the handle of it and stopped. He came closer and stood next to me. I opened the door and said nothing.

"Is that it so?", he said, his voice cracking.

  I lifted my sleeve and wiped the fresh tear off my cheek, while I was looking still at my feet. He took a step forward and pushed it opened. He then got out of the house, walking straight to his car.  
  I wanted to stop him. I wanted to yell that I need him back. But I couldn't.  
  I took my eyes away from him and went to close the door. But something didn't let me to, pushing it to the inside.  
  Suddenly, the door opened and he got in. The next thing I remember is my back crashing on the wall with a loud sound. His lips found mine and then my mind went blank.

"I can't, Em.", he said between our kisses. "I can not stay away from you."  
  Making a line of wet kisses, his lips found my jaw and then my neck. I felt one of his hands trying to take the robe off my body, as the sweet kisses on my neck became stong bites. The wetness between my legs started to build up.  
  I lifted my hand and placed it on the back of his head, encouraging him to continue.  
"Kit-", I whispered.

"What?", he replied, lowering his hands on my almost naked body.

"Don't-", I said as he looked at me, afraid that I'll tell him to go away.  
"Do not stop.", I finally said, causing him to smile.

  I took the fabric of his jumper into my fists and slowly started lifting it up, pulling it finally over his head. I closed my eyes and touched his bare stomach. My hands went even lower, now grabbing his trousers and trying to unbutton them.  
  My fingers stopped moving as his lips found mine once again, and his teeth bit my lower lip lightly. He took my night gown off in one fast move, obviously pleased with my non-bra chest.  
  He raised his hand to my breast and squeezed it gently, causing a moan to escape from my lips on his own.  
  I started working on his trousers again, successfully unbuttoning them this time. With his eyes now burning into mine, I slipped one hand inside his underwear, while pulling the fabric with the other. My cold fingertips touched his warm flesh.

"Oh my-", he didn't complete his sentence, as he stopped to swallow uneasy, closing his eyes.  
  He placed a hand on the wall in front of him to keep his balance straight, and as I started caressing his member his lips crashed again on mine. He was moaning on my lips, whispering my name.  
  All of sudden, he took my hand off his underwear and lifted me up. I curled my legs on his waist, rubbing my core on his own. And just then I realized how much he wanted me at that moment. I couldn't take it any longer.

"Kit.", I whispered, trying to control my breath.

"I know.", he whispered too, encircling my waist with one hand and placed the other one on my neck. "I know.", he repeated.  
  He walked us to the corridor that leads to my bedroom. Once we arrived, he laid me down on the bed and after some seconds, I felt his hot breath on the crook of my neck. He raised his gaze to mine and started leaving small wet kisses from my collarbones and lower. At the same time, his hands took my underwear off, leaving me completely naked in front of him.

"Fuck.", I cursed, when the tip of his tongue touched my nipple. I closed my eyes tight, grabbing on the sheets of my bed.  
  He closed his lips around it and sucked, caressing my waist with one of his hands. I put my both hands on the back of his neck, burying my fingers in his black locks.  
  In a flash, he entered into me without warning, making me forget everything around me as I groaned loudly. He released my breast and stopped, putting his forehead on mine breathlessly.

"I love you.", he whispered, smiling. He claimed my lips instantly, not even letting me respond.  
  He moved again. His thrusts sweet and gentle at first, but after some minutes they became harder and faster. _Oh my god-_  
  I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, bringing his body closer to mine. With each thrust of his, I could hear myself moaning loudly, far too loud.  
"Kit, I'm close.", I said to him and then, one of his hands slipped down between us, finding my clit with his thumb and started rubbing it.  
"Oh-!", I threw my head back on the pillows, feeling my climax. It was then when I heard him groaning and felt his warm seed spilling into me.  
  We both were panting, our forehead colliding with each other while he was still inside me.  
  He cupped my head with both of his hands and gently took the hairs away from my face.  
"Emilia.", he said, trying to catch his breath. I boringly opened my tired eyes and found his beautiful smile. "Happy birthday, Milly.", he whispered.

"What?", I said, confused but smiling.

"It's almost 3a.m.", he replied, giving me a kiss on my lips.  
  I smiled bright and touched his lips with my fingertips. He then bent over and took my lips once again. We both were smiling between our kisses.  
  _Well, that was a birthday I won't be forgetting in a while..._

  

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pain was enough, wasn't it? Well, I decided to give it a break. I think you will appreciate it lol  
>  So, let's take a deep breath here, phew. Love you all, see you soon!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Yeah, it is here after what felt like a lifetime, and I really have to thank you for your patience. Season 8 of GoT had a big part of the delay, cause you know, it destroyed everyone lol. But now the next chapter is truly here! So put your favourite playlist on and enjoy! xx

* * *

 

_Emilia_

 

  
  
  Scenes from last night are flashing in my head. Every touch of his fingertips is tickling my sensitive body, sending shivers down my spin. Small marks decorating secret parts of my figure. _Bruises..._ I smiled at the recall.  
  I didn't even bother to open my eyes to understand that he's awake and watching me. I felt his hand caressing my bare shoulder and back, as I was laying literally all over his chest.  
  
"Stop doing that.", I said smiling in a sleepy voice, and buried my red face on the crook of his neck.  
He chuckled.  
  
"I can't understand what you're talking about.", he said, smiling, hugging me tighter.  
  
"Yeah, right.", I whispered on the surface of his skin.  
  
"Good morning, sleepy head.", he told me, pulling my hair away from my neck and massaging the back of my head.  
  
"Morning to you too, Kitten.", I whispered, planting a kiss on his neck.  
  
"Kitten.", he chuckled. "It's been a long time."  
  
  I moved my head so that I could find his eyes and looked at him.  
"Well, do not get used to it.", I said with a smirk on my lips.  
  
  We both smiled. He then bent down hesitantly and took my lips between his, kissing me softly.  
  I never thought it could be. Not after all these things that have happened in our lives. But here we are. His scent fill my lungs as I lay down on his bare skin. _We were always that way. So comfortable in the presence of the other. We were always one._  
  And suddenly, a thought popped up in my head. _How the hell am I supposed to tell him that I'm leaving today?..._  
  
"We should get up.", I whispered, breaking the kiss as gently as I could.  
  
"Why should we?", he replied, caressing my shoulders.  
  
"Cause we both have things to do.", I said, smiling, as I unsuccessfully tried to escape.  
  
"But it's your birthday.", he said, pulling me back to him.  
  
  I bent down and kissed him, unable to stop smiling.  
"And for that exact reason I must get up." I gave him one more quick kiss and stood up, putting the blue robe around my body.  
"Now seriously. Get out of my bed.", I said as soon as I tied the knot on my waist.  
  
"Okay, okay.", he said, lifting his hands over his head, defending himself. I then saw him pushing the sheets away and getting out of the mattress, completely naked.  
  Idiot. I thought, with a smile on my lips, while I was watching him burying his fingers in his beautiful black locks. He was looking at the view of my garden through the window, having his back to me.  
  
"And, for God's sake, put your trousers on.", I told him, looking at his shaped bum.  
"Unless you want my mum to see you in that condition."  
  
"What?! Wait, is she coming?!", he asked confused, turning to look at me.  
  
"I don't know, it's possible. I mean, it's my birthday.", I shook my shoulders and giggled, unable to hold on.  
  
"Shit.", he cursed, grabbing his pants to wear.  
  
  I laughed at this, and the next moment I heard my phone ringing. I approached and lifted it from the table.

 

  
  _Hey love, as we agreed. Your flight is in four hours. Text me when you're on the airport. Oh, and Happy Birthday! xx_

 

  
  It was a message from my agent. A simple message. Two lines. But with so much weight on it. I felt like my lungs ran out of air.  
  
"There's something that I want to tell you.", I said as quicker as I could at that moment, swallowing violently, trying unsuccessfully to moisturize my sudden dry throat.  
  
"What is it?", he replied, smiling, zipping his trousers.  
  
"Well...", I hesitated.  
  
"So...?", he said, approaching me.  
  
  _Why it has to be that difficult?_  
"I- I had to make a deal too you know."  
  
"What do you mean?", his smile faded slowly.  
  
"Look.", I said, dropping my eyes to the ground. "A long time now, a really long time, I'm a single woman in the public.", I started.  
  
"Em. What are you trying to tell me?", he told me. I can feel his anger growing up.  
  
"Please, Kit. Try to understand.", I almost whimpered.  
  
"Keep going.", he said, looking blindly everywhere but me. I felt my stomach twisting, and I didn't even speak to him about it...  
  
  And suddenly I decided to drop it.  
"I'm doing a Public Relationship.", I said in one breath and swallowed uneasy, waiting for his answer.  
  
"You're doing a what?!", he instantly looked at me, with eyes full of anger.  
  
"Kit. People are already suspecting that I'm in a relationship. Do you prefer to find out that it is you?", I said, now being serious. "It is all over the Web. I don't have any other choice."  
  
"Pfff!", he exhaled loudly, placing his hands on his head and turning his shirtless back to my direction.  
"For how long?", he asked me after some minutes.  
  
"Six months.", I whispered.  
  
"What?! Em, this is too much.", he turned and looked at me, letting his hands to fall on each one of his side.  
  
"I know.", I approached him and put my arms around his waist, letting my cheek touch his muscled chest. I closed my eyes, hearing the fast beating of his heart.  
  
  He placed a hand on the back of my head and encircled my body with the other. His lips landed on the top of my head, kissing my hair.  
"Promise me that you won't let him touch you.", he whispered on my hair.  
  
  I hesitated, remembering what I agreed to do. Tightening my arms around his waist, I took a deep breath of his scent.  
  
"Emilia. Please.", he whispered one more time, running his hand on my hair.  
  
"I promise.", I replied after some seconds, my cheek still pressed on his torso.  
  I didn't want to look at him. Cause I know that he will understand that something isn't right here. _I better do it another time. Just don't take me out of here. I just need to stay here, inside his arms. That's all..._  
  I took a deep breath closing my eyes and tighten my arms around his waist.  
_I'm sorry, Kitten._

 

 

  
  
  
**•+++•**

 

 

  
  
  
  Fortunately, the airport was as I expected. Not many people around. Tuesday is not one of those days many travellers choose to plan their trip. _Lucky me._  
  I wore the pair of black sunglasses that I had in my bag, despite the grey sky and the light rain outside, trying to hide those tired eyes of mine.

 

  
  _Hey, I wanted to inform you that I just did the check-in and I'm about to jump in the plane. I'll call you as soon as I'm in LA. And thank you for your wishes!_

 

  
  I pressed the _"send"_ button and threw my phone in my pocket.  
  Within a minute, it rang and I took it back in my palm.

 

  
  _That's good to hear! Ring me as soon as you can. See you in the US! xx_

 

  
_Great. Just great._ I threw it back in and started walking to my gate. Several people turned to look at me but none of them came to me and I was really thankful.  
  _Here we go_ , I thought when I finally found the number of my gate. I took a deep breath and walked in. _I hope everything's gonna be alright. Besides, it's only for six months. It won't be that bad. Right?_

 

 

  
  
  
**•+++•**

 

 

  
  
  
_Kit_

 

  
_November 23th, 2018_

 

  
  Tonight was the first night of my play _"True West"_. The premiere went really well, so many people came. The moment I stepped on the stage it felt like home. So many emotions flooded my soul. So many memories.  
  Everyone was shocked by my new image. I said goodbye to the Snow's locks, loved by many to be honest. But I had to, because of the role that I got.  
  I believe that the whole thing will go great, it's such an amazing play. Enjoyable even, especially for me, hearing all this laughter because of my action. Everytime I was turning my head to the crowd, seeing all these smiles, I was feeling so happy.  
  Yet not fully. One smile was missing. The only one I needed the most to see.  
  She was miles away from me. It's been a month. Covering a situation I could handle easily on her behalf. _Oh Milly... how stubborn could you be anyway?_  
Those photos though... they destroyed me completely. If only I was near to that dude...  
  But she knows best. She always knows and do what is right. I just hope that this time is one of these right decisions.  
  
  Walking in my apartment, tired by the hours I had to be at the theatre, I took my shoes and jacket off me and let my keys on the small table in the hallway. It's nice returning to your place after a long day. A really long one to be honest.  
I didn't even bother to change my clothes. Taking my phone in my hand, I let my body fall heavily on the couch.  
  
"Six months...", I whispered to myself, letting the device on my stomach.  
She is already in the second month. Second from the bloody six. How am I suppose to be okay with that? Of course I'm not.  
  But I understand. She was in the same place. I now know how much pain it's causing and how difficult it is to say that simple word. "Okay." The effort to smile brightly while you're hurt inside.

 

 

  
  
_*Earlier this day*_

 

  
_My heart started beating faster as I faced the screen of my phone. I let the script down on the desk in front of me and took the ringing device in my hands._  
  
_"Hello?", I said trying to ease my breath._  
  
_"Is that- is that a bad time?"_  
  
_"No! No, absolutely not." I massaged my forehead with my fingertips and leaned on the desk, processing how stupid I sounded._  
  
_"Oh, alright then! I just wanted to wish you good luck for tonight. I know you'll smash it!", she said and I could swear I was able to see her bright smile in front of me. I smiled then too._  
  
_"Oh stop, I'll mess up again.", the frustration was already on my voice._  
  
_"Shut up.", she said giggling. "You'll do great, as always." There was a pause. "You're my champion!"_  
  
_And yet nothing changed. The same supportive Milly..._  
 _"I'm on my rehearsal now. And all I have to say is that if I go up there like this, they'll kick me out of the stage at the first minute."_  
  
_"You're too strict with yourself, Kitten. Everything's gonna be alright."_  
  
_I let go a breath that I hadn't realized I kept inside._  
 _"It could be. If you were here with me.", I said in a low voice._  
  
_"Kit.", she began, "we talked about this. I too wish that I could be there. Believe me, it's the only thing that I want right now."_  
  
_I understood that there was something else._  
 _"But?", I asked closing my eyes._  
  
_"But that's not possible.", she continued, "even if I want to, I can't."_  
  
_"I understand." I can't be that selfish. She has things to do too. "I-", I started but some sounds through the phone interrupted me._  
  
_" *Hey, I'm afraid that you have to come inside.* ", a voice said to her._  
  
_"Yeah, yes, I'm sorry. I'm coming.", she answered nervously to the man who spoke._  
 _"Kit, I have to go now, we-"_  
  
_"Who was that? The guy?", I interrupted her, speaking in a low voice, obviously annoyed. My temperature rising._  
  
_"What? I'm sorry I didn't hear you-"_  
  
_"Nevermind, it's nothing.", I decided to say, closing tight my eyes and pinching my nose. "Have fun." *Have fun? What are you talking about, Kit?*, I thought at that moment._  
  
_"Right...", she answered, realizing that something was not okay._  
 _"I'll try to call you after the play. Good luck, Harington.", she paused. "I love you."_  
  
_"I love you too.", I whispered and then ended the phone call._  
  
_That was the last thing I needed right now. Hearing the voice of that dude, right before my play. Talking to Milly. Oh Gosh._  
 _I wish she was there with me. I wish she could never be in the position to do such a thing. I caused this. And now it is hurting me._  
  
_"Kit! Are you ready? You're out in five minutes.", Kevin, the man who's controlling the lights of the stage, said to me through the door._  
  
_"Yes, I am." I drank a sip of water from the bottle on the desk, took a final look on me through the mirror, and walked out of the room and towards the stage._  
 _This has to be a great night. I will not disappoint them. They believe in me. She- believes in me._  
  


 

 

  
**•+++•**  


 

 

  
  
  The cold air that was coming from the main door made me shift on the couch. I then heard the door closing and slowly I opened my eyes, waking up from the nap I hadn't realized that I took in my living room.  
  Jumping out of the furniture, the first thing I did was to see what time was it. _05:23'am. What the-_  
  Suddenly something fell on the floor behind me, and I turned around as faster as I could manage, ready to face- whatever it was in my property.  
  Trying to see through the darkness I captured a figure, more like a coat itself as the person underneath had to be so small that-  
  The realization made my eyes to open completely. Being now wide awake, I tried to form my thoughts into words, but that was impossible.  
"Milly?", only a whisper came out of my mouth.

 

 

  
  
  
**•+++•**

 

 

  
  
  
_Emilia_  


 

  
_05.21'am. A bit late, isn't it? Or just early enough._  
  Putting the keys in, I slowly unlocked and opened the door of the apartment, sneaking in.  
  My trip got me so tired. I'm happy that I'm finally here. _Home_.  
  _Heavens, it's so cold here. And the wind is just craaazy tonight. It was not like this in LA. Obviously._ I smiled at my own thoughts as I was closing the heavy door.  
"Shit!", I sworn a bit louder than I actually should as the door closed with a really loud noise. I then turned around and saw him. He was sleeping on the couch. I smiled at the view of him sleeping so peacefully. It was a big night tonight for him. I wish I could leave a little earlier. I could be there. With him. Giving him the 'biggest applaud', as he used to telling me.  
  The movement of his body became stronger and I realized that he must be awake. _Great job, Emilia._  
  I walked further and stood right behind him at the time that he got up of the couch. I was not able to control my smile as I saw him stretching his arms and rubbing his eyes with the back of his palms, like a small child.  
  _God, that coat chokes me, I'll just- oh shit, that's not good-_  
  In my process to adjust the oversized clothe on my body, the keys fell accidentally off my pocket, landing on the wooden floor. That was the time when he saw me. My breath was taken away from my lungs when he stormed around and dropped his gaze on the keys, right in front of my feet.  
  I watched him slowly lifting his eyes to mine. My smile then became wider as he opened his eyes in certain surprise.  
  His mouth opened and closed several times, trying to find the right words, I assumed.  
  
"Milly?", he finally said, more like a whisper.  
  
"Surprise...", I whispered too, hiding my flashed face in the neckline of my coat, as if he was able to see the colour of my cheeks through the darkness.  
  
  He said nothing more. He was in front of me in a blink of an eye. His arms came around me, lifting me up and taking my breath away once more.  
  
"Oh!", I gasped, giggling. "I've missed you too, Kitten."  
  
  He let me down and took my face in both of his hands. He was smiling like a fool. I couldn't help but smile back.  
"I can't believe you're really here.", he said caressing my cheekbone.  
  One of my hands came up, touching his wrist, and the other one remained on his waist.  
"Please don't tell me that this is a dream.", he let a whisper on my lips, making me shiver.  
  I shut my eyes as he came closer and our lips locked. His hands unzipped my coat and took it off, letting it slide down of my shoulders. He claimed my bottom lip, kissing me more and more intense. We broke only when we ran out of air.  
  His forehead met my own and he continued to caress my face with his thumbs.  
  
"I saw some photos...", he started but then stopped, trying to control his breathing. His eyes were still shut closed.  
  
"I know...", I whispered, grabbing his shirt to come even closer to his body. I swallowed uneasily before I could speak again. "You know that-"  
  
"Shh. Not now. It's not the right time.", he interrupted me, putting his arms around me and hugging me tight.  
"You're here. That's the only thing that matters now.", he whispered on my hair.  
  
  This is exactly what I needed the most at that moment. The warmth of his body, his comforting words, his voice.  
  
"But,", he suddenly started speaking again, "how did you get in the house?", he came back just enough to see my face but without undoing the embrace.  
  
"Spare keys.", I answered, smiling so much that my cheeks covered my eyes almost completely. "You gave them to me, don't you remember?"  
  
"No.", he said confused, but smiling.  
  
"Oh well, I might took them by my own.", I showed a big smile once more. "Maybe one day while you were sleeping. Or night.", I giggled.  
"I do not remember."  
  
"You're a little trouble, aren't you?" He smiled and put a lock that had fell on my face, behind my ear.  
  I then kissed him again.  
  
"But-", he tried to speak between our kiss. "You didn't tell me."  
  
"What?", I answered, breaking the kiss.  
  
"How did you manage to leave from LA?" He avoided my eyes and I realized how uncomfortable he was, only by referring to the place.  
  
"I was not feeling so well. And I asked them if I could return back. Not that they could refuse though.", I chuckled.  
  
"What? Why, did anything happen?", he asked worried, his eyes travelling all over my face, as he was trying to find something on it.  
  
"Nah, don't worry. It's the climate most likely. This is happening frequently to me. You know, cold, then heat, then cold again. It could be the death of me.", I giggled, obviously trying to make a joke, but it didn't seem that Kit got it.  
"Besides,", I said changing the subject, "I got a new job!", the excitement visible in my voice.  
  
"Really?! Wow, that's great Emilia! What is it about?", he asked me, suddenly so happy.  
  
"It's a Christmas themed movie. You're gonna looove it!", I continued, "its name is _Last Christmas_ , it's going to be awesome."  
  
"Congrats, Em! I'm so happy for you.", she told me, pulling me in for another hug.  
"So that means that you're going to be here?", he asked.  
  
"Aham...", I answered, lifting my eyebrows a little bit. "For the next two months, I guess I'll be here.", I lowered my voice and approached him, brushing my lips on his.  
  
"That's very nice to hear.", he admitted with a smirk on his lips. He then leaned down once again and took my lips in his, this time more aggressively. His hands started exploring my body, trying to pull my jumper over my head.  
  
  _Tonight, is gonna be a really long night. Or should I say day?..._

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this part as much as I did while writing it! Just for your information, the male voice that Kit heard through the phone call was simply an air hostess on the plane. Sorry, but not even the voice of that dude has a place in my writing, lol, no offense. Once again, I deeply thank you for your patience <3 I would love to know about your thoughts on this chapter and why not, about what you expect for the chapters to come ;) See you soon!


	16. ~Last Christmas~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! The next chapter is finally here and I'm so excited for all of you to read... I'd love to know your thoughts about this part of this story, feedbacks are the best motivation for a -not so good- writer (like me lol), so please leave something on the comments if ya want to! Anyway, favourite playlist on and you know the rest! Enjoy!

 

* * *

 

_Emilia_   
  


_December 21th, London_

" _Break, everyone!_ ", Paul Feig, the director of the Last Christmas, the movie I'm currently filming, shouted out, behind the camera.

"Oh thank God.", I whispered in relief.  
_The cold is unbearable these days. And nights. Being only in an elf's costume and a coat, it is really difficult to keep yourself warm in the middle of December. Especially after midnight._  
_Although, I'm very happy that I'm part of this film. I have so much fun. And I'm sure it'll be amazing, as I so far can tell. Everything is just brilliant. The locations, the script, the costumes. And the cast and crew- oh Gosh they all are incredibly friendly and polite. And this is why I know that this project will me beautiful. Besides, we all know it will, no matter what. I mean- it's Christmas!_  
I wrapped a second black coat tight on my body and picked my little package of food up. As soon as I leaned on the small wall behind me, I opened it and my mouth started watering straight away.  
"Finally.", I said and grabbed my dinner, leading it to my mouth.

"Emilia! Hi!", Emma Thompson, who also plays my mother in the upcoming film, waved at me, passing by the place I was standing.

"Hey-!", I waved back with my free hand, as I tried to speak, swallowing a big bite of my dinner.

She came closer, gathering the papers she had on her hands. Emma stopped right in front of me and looked at the food that I was holding with my fingers, confused but half smiling.  
"I thought miss Clarke wasn't eating after midnight, was she?", she said playfully, frowning her brows. "And I also thought you were vegan, no?", she asked again, taking a look at the burger in my palm.

"I-", I swallowed my bite, "I'm not a vegan,", I said smiling, "I'm a pescatarian.", proudly the smile remained on my face. "But, yeah. That's a delicious vegan burger."

"Oh.", she said looking at it and then back at me, with a small smile on her lips. "I see."  
She then started to leave, in an attempt to finally finish the work she had for tonight.  
"So much work for this night!", she shouted as she was walking away. "Last of it before the holiday, huh?", she smiled and then disappeared into the crew.

"Right...", I whispered to myself lifting my eyebrows, as I returned my gaze to my food.  
I took a bite and pulled my phone out of my coat's pocket. I saw an unread message on my notifications. Seeing only the name, a smile appeared on my face.

_I'm home. (P.s. This is an invitation.)_  
_-Kitten_

 

_Two hours ago. He must be sleeping by now._ I chuckled thinking how tired he must be after the play. My fingers started typing.

_It's too late mr. Harington. And I'm sure you're sleeping right now. I'll call you tomorrow, goodnight xx_

  
I didn't even manage to put it back in, and the device vibrated again.

_K: Is it?_

  
I wasn't able to see him, but I knew that there was a half smile on his lips the moment he typed that message, just like mine right now.  
As I started typing again, the screen of my phone became black.  
"What the-", I thought out loud but his face interrupted me, as it appeared on the screen. I press the green button and put it to my ear.  
"Hello?", I said, giggling.

" _Is it really late, miss Clarke?_ ", he said in a low voice, almost sleepy.

"You're crazy.", I chuckled.

" _I might be._ ", he admitted. " _So, how much longer do you have to be there to finish for tonight?_ "

"A half an hour or so.", I said, looking at the crew in front of me, but far away to be able to hear me, chewing my lower lip.

" _Well..._ ", he started, " _do not make me come to take you by myself._ ", he said, trying to hold on his laughter.

"No- don't. You are-"

" _Crazy? Yeah, you already mentioned that._ ", he interrupted me. " _I suppose you'll come by your own then._ ", he continued. " _You have my keys too, as I remember_.", he mentioned, making me blush and smile even more. " _So I can not see any problem with that. Even if I sleep, like you said._ "

"This is blackmail, you know that, right?", I asked him, trying to hide my smile behind my sleeve.

" _I'll be right here, Milly. And you know that._ ", he said back.

" _Guys! Back to work, let's wrap it up for the holidays!_ ", Paul shouted to the cast and crew.

"Kit, I have to go now. I'll call you later-"

" _Oh no, you will not._ ", he interrupted me once more. " _Just come. You don't have to call._ "

"But-", I started.

" _Bye, Milly._ ", he said and right after ended the phone call.

  _Ugh, what an idiot_ , I thought with an indelible smile on my face. I locked the screen of my phone and put it back in my pocket.  
"I'm here!", I shouted to Emma, who was looking for me, as my walk became faster.  
  


 

 

**•+++•**

 

 

 

"Kit?", I whispered, walking in the house. I threw the keys on the small table on my right, took my coat off, and walked forward.  
Around me, it was dark and there was only silence. _I told him. I was sure he will fall asleep. But he never listen to me when I'm speaking, does he? And_ _he_ _, is the one who call me stubborn._ _Me_ _. Who always-_  
"Hey!", I shouted.  
Kit grabbed my waist and lifted me up, scaring me to death.  
"Hey- let me- let me go!", I tried to speak but the laughter was choking me as he was tickling me wherever his hands were able to reach.  
"Shhh! It's pretty late.", he whispered to my ear. He put me down and hugged me from behind, tightening his arms around my small body. I then closed my eyes and smiled, as he placed a kiss on the side of my face.

"Why aren't you sleeping?", I asked him in a low voice, turning my body to face him.

"I was waiting for you.", he answered. "I knew you'll come.", he continued, with a smirk on his heart-shaped lips.

"Oh, I wouldn't actually.", I said smirking too. "I just was sure that you'd stay up all night waiting, so I felt sorry and passed by to say goodnight." My hands moved from his chest to his neck, closing the little distance between our bodies even more.

"Is that so?", he whispered on my lips. "You're so mean, Clarke." He brushed his lips once more, taking my breath away.  
Our lips locked in a second. A sweet dance of our desires. The kiss suddenly became more intense. My hands went automatically to the belt of his trousers, unbuttoning it and lowering the zip right after. He then broke the kiss to pull my jumper over my head, throwing it finally on the wooden floor. His lips and teeth found my collarbone, driving me crazy.  
Having his trousers unzipped, he took off his own shirt, throwing it down too, letting his muscular chest on display. I put my arms on his shoulders, giggling, as he smiled and raised me up, walking to the bedroom.

"I missed you so damn much the whole day.", he whispered between our kiss, as he lowered us on the bed. His hands travelled from my waist to my back, undoing my bra and completely taking it off, as I arched my spine to help him.

"Really?", I teased him, trying to hide the smirk on my lips.

"Aham.", he answered, more like a sound instead of a word, as he lowered his kisses from my neck and collarbones, to my breasts. He created a bee line of wet small kisses from my chest to my stomach and belly, with his fingers working on the button of my trousers.  
In one moment to another, my trousers were thrown on the floor of the room and him lips were once again on mine.  
He placed one of his hands on the side of my face while slowly moved his other hand lower, touching my breast, my stomach, and finally finding my underwear. I drew a sharp breath when his fingers touched the place I craved the most all this time and started making small circles.  
"Kit.", I whispered on his lips, having my eyes closed.

"Yes?", he answered in a low voice, quickening the rhythm of his fingertips.

"I think I'm-", I tried to say, controlling my breath. Suddenly my eyes wide open. "I'm-", I tried once more to speak but the only thing I could do at the moment was to push him away and go straight to the bathroom of his apartment.  
  


 

 

**•+++•**

  
  


_Kit_

 

 

"Emilia?", I said, zipping my trousers back.

  _She just jumped up and left running from the bedroom. Did I do something wrong? I didn't want to hurt her._ I approached the door of the bathroom and pushed it in slowly.

"Don't come in, please.", I heard her weak voice from the inside and stopped my attempt to open the door and get in.

"Emilia,", I started, "is everything alright?", my voice obviously worried.  
She didn't answer.  
"Emilia, I-"

"Yeah, everything is okay.", she answered.  
Her voice was really weak and she barely could convince me.  
I pushed the door open and saw her sitting on the floor, before the toilet. Her feet were under her bum, her knees touching the floor. She had her hands on her face, hiding it into her tiny palms, and her elbows on the closed toilet's cap. I grabbed my bath robe and approached her, wrapping it around her petite body.

"How are you feeling?", I asked her as I sat on the floor beside her and took her in my embrace by her wrist, caressing her shoulder.  
She snuggled up on my chest and took a deep breath.

"Sick.", she finally replied. "I knew that it was too late to eat on the set few hours ago. I guess I shouldn't have though." She adjusted her head on my shoulder and sniffed. "But, for heaven's sake, I really wanted that burger."

"Burger?", I chuckled. My fingers found her soft blonde-brown locks and started caressing them.

"Yeap. I could say that our canteen is brilliant.", she admitted. "That burger was talking to me, I swear.", whispering she curled up on me even more, like a small child.

I kissed the top of her head and tighten my arms around her body.  
"Emilia,", I started again, "I know that it's pretty late, but if you want me to give you a ride to the doctor I-"

"No.", she cut me. "No, it's not necessary.", she said and lifted her face to me, looking at me in the eyes with a weak smile.  
"I just... I just want to sleep a little bit. If that's okay." She slowly turned her gaze on the floor.

"Yes.", I said without any hesitation. "Of course."  
I stood up and placed my hand below her knees, raising her up in my arms. Walking from the bathroom to the now silent bedroom. I looked down at her face, her gaze empty, noticing the pale colour of her once rosy cheeks. _Stubborn. Just let me help you Milly..._  
  
  


 

 

**•+++•**

  
  


 

_Emilia_   
  


 

 

_December 25th, 18:45_ '

 

"H- Hello?", I answered the phone in a trembling voice.

" _Merry Christmas, darling! I'm so sorry for the late, I was cooking all day and hadn't the time. You know your brother, the table has to be full!_ ", she said cheerfully, I was almost able to see her smile.  
My mum loves Christmas. Every year it's a whole new thing. She's preparing so many things and literally doing everything for us. It's true that Bennett wants to see the table full, he's always saying but it's the tradition. He makes me laugh every time.  
When I didn't answer, she continued.

" _Emilia? Are you still there, dear?_ ", she asked me.

"Yeah. Yes, I am.", I said quickly, wiping the small drops that fell on my cheeks.  
"Mum. It's okay, don't be sorry, I know you have many things to worry about this day."

There was a pause. I looked at the wet screen that was touching my cheek, to be sure that the phone call was not over.

" _Did anything happen?_ ", my mum asked me after some seconds. Her previous cheerful voice became more serious.

I hesitated.  
"No." My fist tightened on the paper I was holding, feeling a fresh wave of tears forming on my eyes.

" _We both know that you're not convincing me._ ", she told me.  
And she was damn right.  
" _But I'll believe you and tell you that. Not matter what it is, I'll be right here. Okay?"_

I looked around me, the heavy curtains of my bedroom closed, blocking any sun light of the setting sun, leaving the room in the dark. Hugging my knees to my chest, my gaze dropped on my feet.  
"I know.", I finally said.

" _So._ ", she started. " _What's your plans for tonight? Are you coming over?_ "

"Mum, I'm so sorry, but I'm not feeling like celebrating this day. I guess I'll stay home and watch some of these Christmas films.", I answered. "Kit's coming over too.", I added, almost in a whisper.

" _Oh._ ", I heard my mum saying. " _So you'll have a dinner with Kit and Rose?_ "

"No. Just Kit." I took a deep breath. "They umm... they're not together anymore, mum.", I told her.

" _Oh I see..._ ", she said, wonder in her voice. " _But, anyway. Don't be sorry, you're a big girl now. I understand._ ", her cheerful voice was back again. " _I hope you'll have fun tonight. And please, do not hesitate to ring me at any time, is that clear?_ "

"It is." I answered. "Thanks, mum. Kiss Bennett for me."

" _I will! Bye, darling. We'll talk soon. I love you!_ "

I lifted higher the paper in my fist and my gaze dropped there once more.  
"Goodbye, mum.", I whispered and then ended the call before my voice crack completely, feeling the tears falling on my face and ending up on the paper in front of me.  
_What if I did something wrong? Will she still love me the same? Will everything be okay? Cause the only certain thing is that nothing will be the same anymore._

  There was only one thing I was able to see through my blurry eyes. One word. The only word that is dancing on my mind since the moment I opened that bloody white file, leaving my brain empty and my whole body paralyzed.  
  
  


 

 

**Positive.**

* * *

 

  That was it... *cough cough*. I really hope that you like it, as I did writing it. Things are going more complicated, aren't they? Hmm...  
Thank you so much for your support, it means the world to me! See you soon!

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Your feedbacks are important so let me know what you think about it and if you want me to continue it. Thank you!


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